Sex Ed

I’m supposed to be writing an article but the only downside to writing professionally is that if you’re not feeling it, it’s incredibly hard to do. I’ve been sick all weekend and I’ve also been self-diagnosed with Chronic Fatigue of Everyone Else’s Shit syndrome so I’m tired and none of that is my fault. But anyway ....more

National Twerking Day

Imagine if Michael Scott from the Office was a Chippendale dancer. That is little kid's preferred style of dancing. It's both hilarious and horrifying ....more

Shameless Brag: Mommy's Little Film Maker

Big Kid's final for art was a project called "Impress Me." The only guideline was that the students had to turn in something they believed would impress the art teacher.Some turned in Minecraft worlds, which I'm trying not to be judge-y about but I'm glad my kid didn't do that. He was really serious about his work, even implementing a temporary ban on his favorite website to keep himself on track. He spent many hours at the kitchen table painstakingly drawing, researching and designing the pieces of his project.I know I'm biased but I'm impressed ....more

Super 4

Confession time:1. I'm the only person in the house who hasn't outgrown Playmobil toys. When little kid put his in the "to donate" pile last summer, I begged him to reconsider ....more

Man in the Mirror

"Mom, did you know that scary thing Bloody Mary is supposed to make your face all bloody and pull you through the bathroom mirror?" little kid asked.I told him I did know because I was playing that game in third grade too and that it was just imaginary folklore kids use to scare each other."Seriously. How would that even work? Pulling someone through a mirror?" Big Kid asked."She would smash your head, I guess.""No ....more

End of an Era

On the eve of Easter, I was finishing up some work online when my 11-year-old appeared in the doorway....more

Marathon Runner

I had to pick Big Kid up early from school today because he has a fever, and now he's not allowed back for 24 hours (but they still want a doctor's note to excuse the absence...even though they are the ones who took his temperature and declared him sick.) I'm pretty sure he got the fever because I booked a long overdue hair appointment for the morning and those childhood spidey-senses set off the "Mom's doing something for herself" alarm which triggers an immune system reaction. So we're snuggled up on the couch watching Who Framed Roger Rabbit on Netflix....more

Feline File

A photo posted by Ashley McCann (@ashleyquitefrankly) on Apr 27, 2015 at 5:54pm PDT "What's up with the folder full of cat apps?" I asked little kid after downloading an update for his iPad. "Why? You got a problem with it? ...more

Super Stupid Powers

"If you could have any super power, what would it be?" little kid asked.This is one of his favorite questions. It is not the first time he's asked."Hmmm," I said, because an important part of parenting is feigning interest as often as possible. "I think I'd want the ability to see the future.""Why would you want that?" he asked with genuine confusion."I could win the lotto and avoid bad things and maybe play tricks on people.""You'd use your super power to win the lotto?""Yes ....more

Buddha the Crime Fighter

My kids are at such great ages. Not only are they easy, but they are hilarious and great conversationalists. I often hear news stories or podcasts that I can't wait to share with them because they are such interested little sponges of knowledge.Recently I heard a podcast on Criminal about a man who was tired of the area across from his house being a dumping spot for trash and a magnet for drug dealers and crime ....more