Oooh, being The Peoples witness

Last week I got to testify in court. not just testify but testify as the main witness for the prosecution in front of a jury. and it was exhausting....more

Graveyard

So, I'm working the graveyard shift for the next 3 months which is fine. It's kind of a vacation. while it's hard mentally and socially, it also means less actual work and less dealing with people. BUT the few people are deal with are mostly crack heads and weirdos. Suddenly people will realise at 2 in the morning that they can no longer keep their friends dog and need to get rid of it rightnow. This was an inane conversation I had at 3.15am. ...more

Is 'Hobo' offensive?

I meet a significant amount of people, most of them are fine and some fill my heart with dread.  A lot of the calls I get sent on make no sense until I actually show up. Yesterday, I got sent out to 'a homeless person has left a nest of rats in a planter box '. I genuinely like rats and abandoned rats are usually in very poor condition so I make it a point to respond to the calls as quickly as I can. I roll up and expect to find a shit filled cage and a dehydrated rat but, alas, it was not that simple....more
Heartbreaking. Poor rats. Poor Charles. It would be good if he could have a couple of neutered ...more

I've changed my mind

So, I've been ruminating on what to write here and have deceided to talk more about my work rather than my boring personal life. I am employed as an Animal Control Officer so have a mostly endless supply of funny and/or disgusting stories. My goal is to update a few times a week, but I am notoriously lazy when it comes to this stuff. ...more

baby fearver

I've been trying to figure out what my goal here is and I don't think I really have one. I don't have a shrink so this may just be my alternate mental health outlet. I'll see how much I get out of saying 'and how does that make you feel' to myself....more

stuff and, y'know, stuff

So, I just got back from a super jaunt to Cabo San Lucas. I'm now pouting on the couch with a slightly warm Dos Equis, desperately clinging to the remenants of that holiday vibe. To cheer myself up I decided to start this blog and see what profound and hilarious thoughts I can commit to digi-paper. Anyway, this bottle of wine isn't going to drink it's self y'know....more