Well, I Tried.

"Don't try to do it; just do it."These eight words had the distinct possibility of changing my life when I first heard them over four years ago. To a certain degree, it did. I've always remembered these words. They've constantly served as a charge, encouragement to act, to fully commit to life. And yet, to that other and significantly larger degree, things remain relatively the same....more

Getting out of the Motherhood Time Trap

When I made the decision to relocate to my family home in North Carolina to focus on my writing and help raise my nephew I thought life would become a lot less complicated. I couldn't have been more wrong. Being a full-time surrogate (and single) mother for an eleven year old boy is exhibit A of my internal struggles with masochism. I think I'm losing....more

The Gift of a Palm Reading

We gathered around a spread of figs and cheese, chips and salsa, chocolate chip cookies and candied coconut. A much-needed ladies' night for old friends and new. Later that night I quietly thanked myself for pulling it together and getting out of the house as I was reminded how endearing it is to create the space to enjoy and grow true friendship. We had planned to watch a movie, but even after three hours of laughter and conversation, no one, except the hostess, was ready to ease back into silence....more

"Girls" And Self-Entitlement: Do I Know How Lucky I Am?

We don't have HBO, or cable for that matter, so I'm a teeny bit behind the ball when it comes to television culture. But thanks to the bounty of blog posts and attention given to Girls, I feel like I know enough about the show that's taken the media world by storm. Everywhere I click boasts the show's success or criticizes its lack of diversity, which in turn allows me to offer my ten cents on a show I've never even seen....more
 @laneyta btw- it's tiffany - the VA tiffany :)more

The Blurry Line for Creflo Dollar (and Parents) Between Discipline and Abuse

The comments section on Facebook strikes again. Creflo Dollar, megachurch pastor outside of Atlanta, was arrested early this morning for family violence against his 15-year old daughter. The Root posted a short article about the assault and arrest and provided the ...more

That's Not Racist. It's Sexist!

"That's racist."...more

Why I Stopped Watching Grey's Anatomy But Still Sort of Miss It

Truth be told, there's no better network on television than ABC. PBS is a real close second. Masterpiece Cinema is coming hard with masterfully produced dramatic miniseries like Downton Abbey and really intriguing documentaries that have always been its mainstay. Everything I need to know about former U.S. Presidents, world news, the Amish, the Mormons, and how Americans celebrate holidays and weddings based on their religious, ethnic, or regional background I learned from PBS. Thank you viewers like you. ...more

Nobody Gay Tore My Family Apart

As far as I know, there's only one gay person in my extended family. She's my youngest aunt on my father's side and she's been with her partner for almost 24 years though I never actually met her or her partner until after I'd graduated from high school. She lived less than 45 minutes away from us and I swear I remember being told that she lived in California which so completely out of my frame of reference as a child that I just assumed she didn't really exist....more

Why I Hate Spring More Than Cold Weather, Cats and Cops

Bella-isms readers, my apologies. Life happened. Work + Illness + Travel. I'm in the process of lining up some guest bloggers for the next time I get slammed with an ear infection which by my accounts should be right around mid-June. I've spent the past eight days with a pretty mild ear infection but you know how those things go....more

Can I Tell My Neighbors to STFU and Still Invite Them over for Dinner?

I want to preface with an absolute truth: We like our neighbors.The Dans moved in the day after my roommate and I made the trek to Boston and we were excited to see some friendly faces in East Boston. Seriously. That's not an expression. The faces we'd seen the previous day weren't friendly at all. We said hi to passersby on the street and got nothing. No greetings, eye contact, or smiles. So when we saw them, young and in love and thrilled about living in a new city, we felt like we could be friends with them....more