Who SAYS It's Christmas BRIBERY?

Darcy Perdu of www.sothenstories.comSo then…he pours another glass of wine and asks, “Did everyone else get the anti-Christmas letter from Wal-Mart?”We look up from our rubber-chicken dinners at this industry event -- and laugh at Richard’s question. We’re all salespeople for various auto accessory companies so we call on clients like Wal-Mart, Target, Kmart, and automotive chains....more

Seriously, Lady? Yer Killin' Me Here!

Darcy Perdu of www.sothenstories.comSo then…I toss a couple toys behind the couch and shove the countertop contents into the junk drawer, just as the doorbell rings.“They’re here!  They’re here!” I shout, racing for the door. But I’m the only one dashing, since my 1st grader Tucker is engrossed in his Legos-Hot Wheels concoction and not nearly as excited about this playdate as I am....more

Bring Cash, Tell No One, and Dude -- Be Cool

Darcy Perdu of www.sothenstories.comSo then…he whispers into the phone, “I’ll bring the package to you, but you must bring cash.”“OK, OK,” I say quickly, “but dude, why are you whispering?”Pause.  “I don’t want my boss to hear me.”“Oh, right, right,” I agree.  “Definitely don’t tell your boss.”...more

That Dirty Little Traitor!

Darcy Perdu of www.sothenstories.comSo then…she gently adjusts my bib and slowly reclines the plush leather chair, so I can more easily see the ceiling-mounted TV. Tina, the new hygienist, hands me the remote and recommends a few shows to watch while she cleans my teeth....more

Oh No - She Did NOT Just Say That!

Darcy Perdu of www.sothenstories.comSo then…Janice, the Cast Mom for the 8th Grade production of “Annie,” asks for volunteers to work the 4 show nights – snack bar, ticket takers, congratulations telegrams and so on.  I don’t know her that well, so I’m a little surprised when the emails take a strange turn…Cast Parents:...more

Minding my own business, when suddenly -- what the HELL just HIT me?

Darcy Perdu of www.sothenstories.comSo then…the music soars to a crescendo as the actors scurry about the Broadway stage -- which my boyfriend and I can see perfectly from our fantastic theatre seats. Just as we’re experiencing the spectacular re-enactment of the Fall of Saigon, something comes hurtling off the stage and hits me square in the chest. I am stunned. ...more

COPS, COYOTES, COOKIES & LATE NIGHT ARGUMENT WITH JERKFACEMONKEYBUTT

Darcy Perdu of www.sothenstories.comSo then…I shout, “Fine!”  And then he shouts, “FINE!” -- slams the door, gets in his car, and drives to work. I seethe. We’re in the middle of a big argument and he bails just to go to work?  Where are his priorities? He works at night, so it’s already dark out.  I head to the kitchen....more

Who's Calling the Shots Here?

Darcy Perdu of www.sothenstories.comWho’s Calling the Shots Here?By Darcy Perdu So then… my friends start passing their homemade dishes to the dozen of us guests assembled around their dinner table.  When I turn to the 2-and-a-half-year-old seated on my right and offer him the turkey platter, his mom, another guest, abruptly pushes the tray away and announces authoritatively, “Oh, no, no – he’s vegetarian.”  ...more

Why Criminals LOOOOVE Me

Darcy Perdu of www.sothenstories.com...more

"I Can't Do My Homework Because We Have Termites," and Other Lies My Son Told

So then…I open an email from Tucker’s 6th grade teacher that says: “Dear Mrs. Perdu: Tucker did not have his homework today; he told me this was because there was a termite infestation at home. I told him he needed to ask you to write a note explaining the situation, but he said that his family did not believe in writing notes. However, since our homework policy is not to accept late work, I would appreciate a note or an e-mail when unusual situations occur so that Tucker can receive full credit....more
Last December, my 5th grader told his teacher he was unable to complete his homework because his ...more