Let the Pieces Fall

Water is splashing everywhere, my face is drenched.  I can hear each breath coming in and out of me, a low growling sound emanating from somewhere deep inside.  I look through the thrashing water, see the reason for my struggle.  A face I hate, eyes open in terror.  My hands show no mercy.  I wake from the dream startled, uneasy…as usual.  The dream which has visited me at least once a year for over a decade, though unsettling, no longer scares me.  No longer pleases me either. ...more

Walk on the Ocean

 {We spotted the ocean at the head of the trail Where are we going, so far away and somebody told me that this is the place Where everything’s better, everything’s safe ~Toad the Wet Sprocket} To my Phoenix,...more

So sweet! I love the imagery and it makes me want to take my kids to the beach. I love the ...more

When Hope is Enough

{I wrote this post about a month ago on my blog, there has been an update to this situation which I will hopefully write about soon, but for now I wanted to share this part of our journey with the Blogher community.}  It’s late.  Nearly 2am, and I’m wide awake, nerves jangling.  Paul and I completed a huge task tonight, one that will affect our family in a major way depending on the decision of forces beyond our control. ...more

The Phoenix Hope

The phoenix hope, can wing her way through the desert skies, and still defying fortune’s spite; revive from ashes and rise. ~Miguel de Cervantes, Don Quixote I have grown quite accustomed to strange looks when I tell people the name of our new baby, Phoenix.  One person, who will remain unnamed, told me they couldn’t imagine that being a real grown-up name, that it would sound strange for someone to one day say to him “Oh, I love you, Phoenix”. ...more

A Mother Born...

The moment a child is born, the mother is also born.  She never existed before.  The woman existed, but the mother, never.  A mother is something absolutely new.  ~Rajneesh This weekend was absolutely beautiful.  The weather hovered around 70 degrees, bright sunshine, with a wind that tousled my hair just a little as we walked downtown. ...more

The Shape of This Mother...

What do you feel when you look at that photo?Shock?Revulsion?Fear?...more

Wow, I'm honored for you to comment on this post, Bonnie! Your website truly changed my life, ...more

The Happiest Day of my Life....

If there is one great lesson I have learned in the short time I’ve been married, it’s that your wedding day (if I may be so bold to say) is not the happiest day of your life.  I would even go one step further and argue it shouldn’t be the happiest day of your life....more

I completely agree! I think you put it very nicely. How sad that for some people that process ...more