Dinner Time! (Or: The Stalker)

5:01pm “Seriously? It’s 59 minutes ’til dinner, girl.” ...more

Random Thursday: I’m Still Random Edition

1. How do you handle socks and underwear? Do yours live in a shared drawer or do they each have their own? Do you fold or stuff? I need to know ....more

Resolution: WORD!

I knew my word instantly. I tried to think, and think hard, because perhaps this wasn’t really my word. Maybe there was another, easier word. This one had been coming on for some time, placed at the forefront of my brain again and again and again as an imperative that must be heeded if I am to survive ....more

My Pinterest-Perfect Christmas (Hardy Har Har)

Several times over the weekend, I thought back to the hopeful, idyllic words I had written in number five of the Random Thursday: Happy New Year Edition post. When I wrote them, I was very sure of myself ....more

Random Thursday: Happy New Year Edition

1. For two solid years, I daily hounded the Monkey to practice his saxophone. I threatened, I yelled. I employed other (insane and unproductive), non-Love & Logic-approved parenting tactics. This saxophone, the one he begged us to play, certain that girls would swoon every time he picked it up, became my nemesis. It was a rented saxophone, which in the end, I returned to the music store and paid some outrageous extortionist’s fee for them to take off my hands ...more

Happy New Year And All That Jazz

For several weeks, I’ve been thinking about thinking about composing this first post of the new year for you. The standard format is to talk about resolutions, either those profound changes I have determined to make happen in my own life, or some brilliant words of advice for helping you achieve yours ....more

I (Have) Never

Watched -a single episode of any of the Real Housewives shows. -any show with “Jersey” in its title. -reality shows about truckers, or fishermen, or loggers, or any other dangerous occupation. -reality shows (and yes, I am using that term loosely) about child models, or child dancers, or child actresses and their wacko mothers ....more

Random Thursday: Last Thursday in 2012 Edition

1. On the first day of December, I couldn’t zip up my favorite jeans. On that day, I lamented having been born in the Eating Month. What I realize now, on this 27th day of December, in the year of our Lord 2012, even as I am struggling to take a full breath while wedged into my largest-sized jeans, is that I was born in the month that is the warm-up to the Eating Month. It’s been really, really fun. And ...more

Few Words, Many Tears

I’m sitting in one of two comfy chairs in a Starbucks in Fredericksburg, Virginia, minding my own business. My heart is a boulder in my chest, and I’m prone to weeping. I am scanning through the news on my phone while holding back tears. I can’t seem to stop the tears ....more

The Obligatory I’m Back Post

So…it’s been nearly a month since I dropped off the face of blog-land. I’ve given thought as to exactly how I might reappear here. As I see it, there are several options at my disposal: ...more