The Bewitching Hour

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“Children are not a distraction from more important work. They are the most important work.”

"Today was one of those days. Teething baby up all night so he woke up a crabby toddler, very clingy, very sad for being so tired. We didn't get to go to a play date. We didn't get to leave the house. But we did get to cuddle, which I hear is a commodity that dries up sooner than you think. We got to laugh a lot and play with some of the favorite toys, read the favorite books. We did what it took to make us both feel better. The day didn't go according to plans. But that is usually the day I know the little fella needs me the most."  This was my Facebook post a couple weeks ago. Does this sound like you? More often than not, it happens. You don't have it all working well. Nothing goes right. You are NOT in control. The pieces don't all fit and everything does not get done. But guess what mamas, it's ok. This constant striving to keep it all together can be exhausting. Taking these moments and turning them into mama gold is the challenge. When you can't get out of your own way, stay home. I don't believe in being that mama who is telling her wee one to "hurry up".  I remind myself in these situations that we are not performing brain surgery. No one's life is on the line if we don't show up to that play date, class or other engagement because the day isn't working. Sometimes you know it by 7am. Other days it creeps in on you all day long in series of falling dominoes of everyday life with a baby, toddler or preschooler. Those are the days you realize too late that you should've thrown the towel in. Quitting is not for losers, quitting sometimes is for those who realize it's not working, it'll get worse, and our little ones can't always vocalize their feelings in time.If we are feeling overwhelmed, imagine how much worse it is for our child when things are flopping. It can be the time where you turn around, take them out of the car seat, go back into the house and take a stack of books and sit quietly to read with your child. Or where you take the detour from where you were supposed to go and do something different like swing on a swing in a quiet park. You step away from the art project that is not going well or that your child is just not feeling. Or maybe just give hugs, lots and lots of hugs to our little one. The modern culture is full of people suffering anxiety. I think there's so much pressure of failing or not living up to expectations put onto us and our children. They learn from us at a young age that things "have to get done", "we have to succeed" "we need to go NOW!"   What we don't teach our kids or remind ourselves, is that a failure is a learning opportunity and that when things don't work, be ok with a Plan B or Plan C. Instead of rushing into that doctor/dentist/haircut appointment late, call and cancel and regroup. No one will be crushed if you do so. You might just save the day by turning back and holding your little one's hand and saying "let's slow down" instead of screaming "hurry up!"  We're not always going to be in this season of our lives and things will evolve. It's ok mamas, we got this. “Children are not a distraction from more important work. They are the most important work.” -CS Lewis Follow me at the Sassy Funny Mama Blogspot

Anybody really know what time it is? Anybody really care?

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Don't Take Facebook Personally...Really

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Mindfulness (or lack thereof), Christmas Rush and the Elf

Being mindful is not the easiest task when you are a mom, especially when you are new in the role. A lot of talk went on this summer over the Georgia father who left his child in the hot car to die. Numerous mommy blogs then kept popping up with moms confessing to accidentally leaving their child in the car, at the store, lost in the mall, and sharing their guilt. I personally don't feel that moms should be put on the spot about this and feel horrible that it become a news story that then morphed into a whole zeitgeist about lack of mindfulness in parents....more
Yes! I hear you, sista! And I say so in my rap "ChristmasTime"...the whole thing gets out of ...more

The Hybrid Mom

I'm A Mama

After being in the weird category of "just a stepmom" for many years,  I'm a mama now. I'm coming out of the fog of the first year and reflecting on what this means. I'm a mama, I eat toddler tapas all day--bits of cheese, nuggets of either fish or chicken, random puffs and Cheerios as I try to get some housekeeping done while my son is napping. Haute on-the-go mom cuisine! ...more

Unemployed By Choice, Part Two

What do you do when the job you have taken has taken the life out of you? When the end of the road comes at a job before you have something new lined up, what's the next step? Do you stick it out or do you leave on your own terms? I had reached that crossroads. I had a decision to make. I knew that being in a job that compromised my integrity and held me back from achieving my true potential was not the place I wanted to be....more

Unemployed By Choice, Part One

Many people live in the fear of losing their job and not being able to find another one. The recent dismal unemployment numbers show that this fear is not unfounded. What if you don’t lose your job but leave by choice? This is the unemployed group that no one talks about. What happens when you find yourself in a soul-crushing job situation or one where your morals are being tested?...more

The Zen Of Small Tasks

We live in a world where multitasking is lauded and encouraged. But aren’t we missing something here? The more things you do at the same time, the less you are able to do all of them WELL. Technology has created a general distractedness among all of us. We are never doing just one thing at a time. If you are not doing something with 100% of your focus, then you are usually not doing something 100% right. Something always seems to get lost. Maybe technology can do something 100% right all the time, but the human brain isn’t capable of it, especially when our focus is all over the place....more