How to Have a Relationship the Lasts a Lifetime

When can you put your relationship on autopilot and let it run itself?Anytime you want, as long as you don’t really care where things go.Someone suggested to me a few days ago that my Honey and I make marriage look easy.  She asked what my secret was.  The answer is easy.  We put as much energy into our relationship as we would if we were trying to “save” it.  I thought that was a genius, easy answer.  She was horrified.  “Oh my God.  That sounds like so much work.”...more

Would You Give Up Marriage for an Annual Agreement?

Let’s face it.   We all know “till death do us part” is not a mandate.   It’s not the law.   It’s not a given.   In our culture, whether we want to admit it or not, marriages are not necessarily permanent.   They certainly aren’t disposable.  However, there is a thing called divorce and many of us myself included, have had one.  ...more

Is Compromise a Relationship Killer?

com·pro·mise:   To compromise is to make a deal between different parties where each party gives up part of their demand. Relationships are built on compromise, right?  Well good business partnerships might be built on compromise.  But as counterintuitive as it might sound, for long term romantic relationships, compromise is a relationship killer, at least a satisfaction killer....more

10 Questions That Could Save Your Relationship

A friend of mine recently joked that I’m in the break up management business. Although, I like to think I do more than that, there is some truth to that description.  The next two weeks are the busiest of the year in the break up management business.Sometimes it’s because Valentine’s related disappointment will bring too many long held resentments to a head.  Sometimes it’s because one partner has been planning a break up but didn’t have the heart to do it before the big day.  Whatever it is, the end of February is traditionally an onslaught of break ups....more

Nagging is the Leading Cause of Deafness in Men

It’s pretty common for a woman to feel like her man doesn’t listen to her.  I hear it a lot.  I hear it a lot because it happens a lot.  However, there’s a reason and in most cases it’s avoidable.  When a man feels like he’s being nagged he shuts it out.  You may not think you’re nagging, but he may feel like you are more often than you’d imagine.  It’s like his brain hits the mute button without him even knowing it....more

Four Things You Can Do This Weekend for an Even Better Relationship

Sometimes “working on your relationship” just seems like too much, well, work.  There is a perception that it takes grand gestures and deep talks to improve things on the homefront or make a relationship strong.  However, when it comes right down to it, little things usually make a big impact too, maybe an even bigger impact if they are done consistently....more

Confessions of a Drama Addict

I realize the account you are about to hear sounds like something that should have come out of the halls of a middle school somewhere, and yet it didn’t.  This was me, last week, and trust me, I’m well beyond middle school. ...more

The Exit Strategy

One of the biggest parts of my business is people who come to coaching intensely wanting to save their marriage.  It’s a worthy and noble thing to want.  This bit we hear all the time about people “these days” thinking marriages are disposable, isn’t really true.  The vast majority of people treasure their marriages, and although they may not know it until the marriage is rocky, would do most anything to save them....more

Top Five Tips for How to Make Your Man Feel Loved on Valentine’s Day

I talked to a man last week who was getting ready to go on a year long backpacking adventure. He fully admitted he was trying to run away. The ink on his divorce papers was barely dry when he called a travel agent to book tickets to Costa Rica. He was profoundly sad and incredibly unprepared to go on a year long backpacking trip, but was going to go anyway....more

Lonely on Valentine’s Day

Dear Lisa,Don’t get me wrong.  I’m not sitting at home crying.  But let’s face it.  I’m going to be alone on Valentine’s Day, again.  I keep telling myself it’s just a manufactured holiday that doesn’t really mean anything.  However, when all my friends have dates and all anyone is talking about is what they are planning, I feel totally left out....more