END POEM

I had no idea this existed, but for the sake of my Minecraft-loving children I'm glad it does: and sometimes the player believed the universe had spoken to it through the zeros and ones, through the electricity of the world, through the scrolling words on a screen at the end of a dream and the universe said I love you and the universe said you have played the game well and the universe said everything you need is within you and the universe said you are stronger than you know and the universe said you are the daylight and the universe said you are the night and the universe said the darkness you fight is within you and the universe said the light you seek is within you and the universe said you are not alone and the universe said you are not separate from every other thing and the universe said you are the universe tasting itself, talking to itself, reading its own code and the universe said I love you because you are love. And the game was over and the player woke up from the dream. And the player began a new dream ....more

Taking names (and questions)

This post is...more

In which I am saved

Today the postal service finally forwarded me our last Portland water bill, which came in at $1,034 for our final three months at House of Yes. We lived with a bunch of dirty punk rockers...more

Suburbia

Alex didn't get home tonight until after 7:00. He'd spent the day mowing lawns and chopping down trees (for fun) at the house of the grandparent's of the friends who live across the street from his dad's house. These are the same girls who used to live next door to us before our ...more

GOOD NIGHT MOMMY I LOVE YOU (FIFTY-THRICE)

The thing about my daughter's OCD is that it triggers every abusive thing that's ever happened to me. I routinely stop breathing regularly around 7:30 pm because that's when it starts. Every night I head into bedtime with a plan ....more

My Left Knee (aka My Achilles Heel)

Several months ago I catastrophically injured my left knee. I wish I could brag that it happened while deadlifting my own weight or jumping out of an airplane, but no. I went upstairs to tuck Alex in for bed and hopped down onto his mattress on the floor, obviously forgetting this was the mattress that Dave and I had shared for the last five years of our marriage, which, five years AD, has the thickness of a hammock ....more

Live! From the basement! It's my 39th Birthday!

I don't know exactly why 39 feels so much scarier to me than 40, but it does. Almost like it's my last year to be "young" and I have a lot to accomplish before my tits fall off or something. I don't know ....more

John

This afternoon after work Alex and I took the Max downtown to have a dinner and a movie date. I've been trying hard to make special time for him because his sister has been such a monumental pain in his ass lately. He keeps begging me to change the schedule so he never has to be around his sister ever ....more

2014: Year in Review

1. What did you do in 2014 that you’d never done before? I finally went to New York ....more

Eighteen: Better

Today was the first day I've felt even remotely normal since I started Cymbalta. The weird twilightiness is gone and I haven't felt queasy all day, but I still have this weird lump in the back of my throat. My inner sci-fi nerd likes to imagine it as my brain stem swelling to adjust to the new chemicals ....more