Fourteen in '14

Leo was born in 2000, so his birthday age will always match the year. Convenient, that, for those of us who take a few moments to remember our own age. Doesn't make it any less shocking that our boy is fourteen ....more

In Search of Superego Style Food

Fettucine with smoked salmon & vodka cream sauce.[Image: a pile of flat noodles topped by chunky redsauce, in a beige bowl with black curlicue accents] I am not a great cook. But I am really good at making food that I really like to eat. As you might suspect, this can be a problem ....more

Mourning and Advocating for Autistic Murder Victim London McCabe

You have probably heard that London McCabe, a six-year-old autistic boy, has been murdered by his mother. I want you to stop and remember that sweet boy, think about his utter terror as he was killed by the person he should have been able to trust the most in this world. I want you to mourn his loss ....more

Milestone Land

We never leave the land of milestones. That's probably a good thing. First kid to get their driver's permit, and take a driving lesson (Iz) First time one of our cats gets attacked by a bobcat (our TacoCat, she's going to be OK) First time we leave Iz and Mali home together (So I could go to the emergency vet, see above) First time Leelo has a full dental cleaning without anesthesia (thanks to years of hard work on his and his dentist's part) First time our dude learns to run the bleachers (video at bottom) First time Mali gets a yellow belt in Karate First time Leo and his stylist insist on me sitting down rather than hovering while our guy got his lid did First time Leo and I have bit parts in a documentary you can buy (Citizen Autistic) First time Seymour produces a series for PBS Digital (Pygmy Seahorses pilot is great, watch it!) First time I turn 45 ....more

Parenting Kids With Disabilities: How to Get Through Tough Times

When parents like me talk about our kids with disabilities and intense support needs, we have to be thoughtful. We need to make it quite clear that our kids are much-loved and very awesome human beings. We should never, ever state or imply that any challenges we face as a parent are our children's fault. We need to handle their privacy with delicacy. And we shouldn't accidentally enable disrespect towards children who are already too-frequent magnets for morbid fascination, and pity....more
As a parent, I hope everyday I am teaching, not preaching. I also have to step back and let go ...more

Follow Up: Radiolab's Underwhelming "Juicervose" Autism Coverage

Mali, shortly after getting into a verbalsparring match with Demetri MartinAt a 2011 Radiolab show in Berkeley.[Image description: girl with beige skin andbrown fuzzy hair pulled back, wearingwire-framed glasses, smiling, wearing a multicolored long sweater,in front of a blue screen with white words inside a black box reading: "IN THE DARKwith Thao Nguyenand Demetri MartinPILOBOLUSRADIOLAB"] One week later, I am still so sad that Radiolab bungled their Juicervose autism episode. I've been wanting and waiting for them to do a truly autism-focused episode for just about ever. I even wrote about what I'd like to see in a Radiolab autism episode, in 2011 ....more

Amplify This: "Don't Murder Your Autistic Kids"

When we hear that a mother has tried to murder her own child, most people howl in agreement that the mother deserves to be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law. Most would be angry if that mother successfully plea bargained her attempted murder charge down to child abuse. Most people would not "understand" mothers abusing or murdering their kids ....more

Changing Conversations: When Parents Murder Disabled Children

Michigan parent Kelli Stapleton recently pled guilty to poisoning her autistic teen daughter Issy. According to police reports, Kelly lured Issy into a van, "drugged her, lit the grills and left the van to get more charcoal while her sleeping daughter breathed in poisonous carbon monoxide fumes." Kelli and Issy both survived the attempted murder-suicide....more
pseudopodia Shannon Des Roches Rosa newzealanditisthen Jess at Diary of a Mom summarized how I ...more

So What if God is Change; Change Is Hard.

Anything different is bad. That is Leo's mantra. It's also mine ....more

Blogust: When Your Comments Save Lives

August = Blogust. And Blogust is the wonderful time of year when the UN Foundation's Shot@Life taps members of the social media milieu and Blogosphere, to use our synergistic connectivity to save lives: "Every time you comment on or share the Blogust posts, Walgreens will help provide a life-saving vaccine for children around the world who need them most."That means that every comment -- on this post, or on one of the Blogust14 posts that will be rolling out during this month of August -- is literally a chance to save a life, to get a vaccine to a child who otherwise would not get have that chance. It couldn't be easier, so please comment comment comment and spread the word.Here's more of what Blogust is all about: Image description: tiny beige-skinned girl,age 3, holding an inflated purple latexglove in front of her face ....more