It's happening!! I wrote a BOOK!! :) Who knew peeing my pants would lead to this?!

So excited!  The Kindle version of my book, "Tales From The Pantry: Random Rants & Musings of a Stay-At-Home Mom", is now available! The paperback will be available November 15th on Amazon.com and barnesandnoble.com! :)  Thank you so much for all of your support!http://www.amazon.com/Tales-Pantry-Musings-Stay-at-home-ebook/dp/B005MR4......more

Sticky McStickerson...

I am starting to wonder if I will be sticky for the rest of my life.  I never really paid much attention to how often I was sticky before having kids.  Probably because I wasn't ever sticky.  Or if I was sticky, I would wash my hands and be done with it for another year or so.  But after having children I find that sticky has become a way of life.  I am forever sticky...gummy...tacky...and not in that tacky "I'm wearing teal toe nail polish" kind of way.  (I mention that because I just made this poor choice today.  Not sure what I was thinking.  I thi...more

"Your call is very important to us" is the new "Do you want fries with that?"...

There is currently a phenomenon taking place across America and your roving reporter is here to bring it to you!  Don't be fooled by media propaganda!  The recession is apparently all in our imaginations, because although "my call is very important" to them, they are "currently experiencing high call volumes & longer wait times".   Who is 'them' you ask?  Well, apparently it is EVERYONE!  EVERY flingin' flangin' company from here to the Appalachians is experiencing 'high flippin' call volume'!  Phone company, cable company, refrigerator repairman, and even freakin' QVC!!...more
Now you phone will listen to their merry music on your behalf! The application waits for the ...more

Love me...love my balls.

I had no idea that other people did not decorate their antenna's with balls.  This has caught me completely unawares.  Is it because I live fairly close to Disneyland?  There is definite ball pressure in my neck of the woods.  Especially amongst fellow Mommies.  Don't deny it...you know who you are.  I see you looking upon my balls w/ envy.  Hey, it's no secret where to get them.  You just have to put forth a little effort.  And by effort, I don't mean STEALING.  There is currently an Amber Alert out on my Tinkerbell.  Some bastard ripp...more

This is one of the strangest posts I've ever read. How is this a thing?

You guys are ...more

Incompetent...or incapable? THAT is the question!

Is it just me, or is there an awful lot more screw ups these days?...more

Happy New Year, I'm drawing a blank.

Monday, January 3, 2011 ...more

I froze!

I've gotta be honest, I got a little bit of stage fright.  I felt like Cindy Brady, staring at that red light from the camera, unable to move.  What caused such terror, you ask?  Well, first I peed...then I posted.  Peed, then posted, then watched as over 4,000...ok, who am I kidding?  Like I don't know the EXACT amount!  4,158 people read my post.  Then retweeted and reposted 77 times.  It was exhilarating!  But then the pressure set in.  I felt like there were expectations...assumptions...and other 'tions' that I can't quite think ...more

My Disneyland recap...

I realize I've been MIA for about 3 weeks.  The shame of it all. :(  But the day we went to Disneyland, my mom was watching Adam and long story short, fell down the stairs and broke her leg.  So things have been a little busy around these parts, and with Christmas coming...well, ok...excuse out of the way.  Moving on... Back to Disneyland... "Get your 20-something ASS out of Fantasyland!!"  is what I wanted to say.  Allow me to wrap up Fantasyland for you young adults out there so that you can move on with your life; ...more

There, but for Camille Grammer, go I.

It has come to my attention that there may be some things that I neglected to mention.  Not intentionally, I just didn't think about it until one night when a few friends close to the situation, pointed it out to me.  And then it hit me.  Like a TON. OF. BRICKS!...I could have been Camille Grammer.  True story. ...more

I peed my pants. I literally peed. on. myself.

Whomp, there it is.  Me, in all my glory.  This is what my life has come to.  Two degrees, small business owner, wife and mother of 2, and now I will only be known as The Urinator.  I accept defeat WORLD!! YOU WIN!  I peed the fight right out of me.  How did I find myself in such a situation, you ask?  Well, pardon the pun but it all started because I was pissed.  Literally and figuratively.  Let's take a look back, shall we?...~cue wobbly screen and Mike Meyers~ "biddily-doo, biddily-doo, biddily-doo". ...more

Shari - you're a rare gem! I can't wait to read more of your stories. more