Uncle John’s Journey to Blue Jay

California is renowned for its Indian Summers. As the season wanes, warm weather persists – perfect for an afternoon out on the lake with friends and family. The Welker family spent many summers in Lake Gregory, a small town in the San Bernardino Mountains ....more

Disney – Teenage Saga of Angst

Ever wonder if Cinderella was exaggerating her tale of woe because she was a teenager. Before we go our merry way villianizing stepmothers and portraying sea witches as bitches – have we taken a moment to look at things from another’s perspective? It’s hard to be a teenager, especially in a culture of mean girl subtle bullying ....more

School’s Back in Session: May the Odds be Ever in Your Favor

Picture is worth 1,000 words. Kindergarten. Appearing as adorable tiny tots to those who have been there, done that, and a momentous milestone for parents who once thought they’d have to grant NICU privileges to a high school math tutor ....more

A Short Story – The California Drought, Day 1,643

Once lush green stalks of tall grass glowed an angry red, as though they had been sunburned instead of merely water deprived. I always presumed I would see plumes of yellow during the deep dog-days of summer, as the plants prepared for winter and reminded me to take hay fever medication. It was, after all, almost August ....more

The Saga of Destroy and the Goose

Do not be fooled. Let’s get the preliminaries out of the way: geese are assholes. Yesterday I posted a picture (see above) of the moment just before Destroy got bit by brethren of the aforementioned foul fowl ....more

Octopus Crime

Nana brought a bunch of vintage Transformer toys over. (Toys really were cooler when we were kids.) In any case, Search and Destroy both have full-blown Transformer fever. The symptoms of which are best represented by constant bickering over which is deemed “the coolest toy” of the moment ....more

Odds Are

Struck by lightning, sounds pretty frightening But you know the chances are so small Stuck by a bee sting, nothing but a B-thing Better chance you’re gonna bite it at the mall But it’s a twenty-three four-to-one That you can fall in love by the end of this song So get up, get up Tell the bookie put a bet on “not a damn thing will go wrong” If we put the odds of dying from any and all possible causes at a 1:1 ratio – because let’s face it, life is fleeting and all our candles will snuffed out in the blink of an eye in terms of time on this teacup ride – odds are we’re gonna be alright for another night. According to the CDC, before the U.S. widely implemented the measles vaccination program in 1963: 3-4 million people in the U.S. got measles each year. 48,000 were hospitalized ....more

Best Day Of My Life (Chorus Remix)

This is gonna be the best day of my life My li-i-i-ife Oo-o-o-o-oo This is gonna be the best day of my life My li-i-i-ife I’m never gonna look back Whoa, I’m never gonna give it up No, please don’t wake me now ...more

The iPad is NOT a Chew Toy

Bad dog. The sun was just about ready to set as the hours rolled on – drawing the summer solstice to a close. Inside the house, muppets were restless in their beds as the night was not yet dark despite the passing of bedtime ....more