New Beginnings...Despite Retrograde
(This was written July 9 - during Mecury Retrograde. I decided to share)
Today is the first day to the new chapter in my life.
I’ve experienced some great things over the last few months which include: graduating from college, receiving a promotion at work and accepting a marriage proposal from my partner of four years. Things have definitely turned around for me in the last year and I couldn’t be more pleased. However, I’m a believer in living life with an obscene amount of gratitude, passion and purpose and I strongly believe we all have one. Finding out where your passion lies seems to be a complicated task – but, nonetheless, very simple.
As a child, I thought about being an obstetrician. The thought of being a participant in bringing life into the world seemed fulfilling. That is until I got a dose of reality. The “spunk” quickly dissipated once I watched a woman give birth. Can we say GROSS??!! Next, I thought of being a child psychologist. We all know there are plenty of children that’ve been exposed to abuse, trauma and unpleasant experiences with no resource or anyone to confide in, resulting in mental illness and self-destructive behavior. While this still interests me, the thought of it became too much to bear. My personality type is that of an extremely hypersensitive, overly emotional and empathetic, compassionate person. With that in mind, a career in this field would affect me emotionally, resulting in future issues of my own. Adding to that, I have a background in Forensic Psychology. Some issues are all too familiar and hits close to home, creating the inability of separating family issues to my work – something I cannot allow into my personal space so…there goes that.
One thing remains true despite my career attempts: I enjoy helping people through their issues which, in turn, helps me proactively work through mine; and I question everything that affects me emotionally, spiritually, psychologically, physically and sexually. No matter how uncomfortable it makes others, I’m forced to reveal and talk about it. I’ve started and deleted about four blogs because I wasn’t dedicated to posting weekly out of sheer laziness, which resulted in inconsistency and me being stagnant. While I may be many things, I am not stagnant or phony and when I feel something, I speak on it. The truth is something I stand strong in and therefore, whatever grows within me, will flow.
Here will be my space to do just that – flow. I’m a work in progress and I will experience many emotions, ratchet experiences, moments of enlightenment and many other things. I am an open canvas with a custom-made outline while patiently…allowing the colors of life fill me in.