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Yes, I know...3 recaps in 2 days. I can't help the summer programming schedule people!
Last week's episode was a sort of low in inter-designer relations and totally belied my usual praise for Project Runway as being about the talent not the personalities. This trend continued last night, but will hopefully be laid to rest a bit after this week's results.
So, the episode starts with Heidi exhibiting some truly scary looking bangs. Those bangs could conquer a small European nation by the look of them. She announces that this week they will be designing for an international jet-setter. She refers cryptically to "benefits of winning" this challenge "that will be revealed later" in one of PR's famous Heidi-dubbed-in-later moments.
The twist: the "jet-setter" in question is themselves. They will each design an outfit for themselves, which should be perfect for international travel, and they will walk it down the runway. So two weeks in a row with no models. Hey, I thought it was supposed to be a competition for them too. So far they've mostly been sitting on their butts.
The designers have 15 minutes to sketch, $75 to spend and one day to execute. They show each designer waxing poetic about what "jet-setting" means to them.
For Vincent it's "things that don't wrinkle." Yup, that's what Paris Hilton says when she pens her closet: "what have I got that won't wrinkle?" Dude what happened to clothes that "get you off"? At least if you trotted out that phrase this week it might be a little more fitting then when you're talking about an outfit for a dog...talk about inappropriate!
For Uli it's something tat will look good "even if you get wasted." Uli!! Still waters etc. etc. You party animal.
Jeffrey can't let go of talking about last week's challenge, whining about Angela's "difficult" mom. Yeah, because rock stars,jet-setters and fashion divas are never difficult, right? Is it perhaps that you can only stomach difficult skinny people, huh? Huh?
Laura continues to stoke my girl crush by dropping such bon mots as "Jeffrey's often being an asshole" and "there's no time to dick around." Get on with your glowing, early pregnancy, don't mess with me, red-headed self, Laura!
So, much fabric buying and pattern cutting, and unnecessary seeing of Vincent in his boxers, and Michael being too cool for school, and Kayne being adorably white trash and Tim Gunn's furrowed brow of concern ensues before we get on with the show:
1. Vincent kicks it off in pajamas. Well, OK, it's baggy pants, a baggy v-top (both in black) and flip flops.
OK, my first thought was: this looks like an outfit they might distribute to patients in a low-security mental health facility. From the front it was completely shapeless and uninteresting. I will give it to Vincent that the back of the pants looked pretty well-executed. And of course it did look comfortable and wrinkle-free. I guess it's no surprise that the guest judge from Calvin Klein would like it for its simplicity. ut I fund it a bitboring.
2. Jeffrey follows with a totally cliched and unoriginal "rock star" outfit
This was "designed", Michael Kors? Really? Let me tell you what I saw:
a. the same ankle boots that Jeffrey's Pirate Madonna wore down the runway
b. A t-shirt with a gilttery skull on it...oooh, ahhh, could buy it at the mall this afternoon
c. Skinny pants with some kind of crotch chain or stripe or whatever....hello? Every metal band in the 80s and 90s.
d. A purple jacket that was worn by either Prince or Nancy Wilson form Heart in the 80s.
Sure, he looked fine. And sure, it was him. (Then again, Kayne's outfit was totally "him" too, but that didn't seem to help him.) But there was not one iota of design or freshness about this. Michael and NIna Garcia were smoking crack.
3. Angela was up in brown knickers, a maroon baggy top, another hobo bag and an overall schlumpy appearance.
Angela did a bad, bad thing. Unattractive in almost every way. And al the rosettes in the world won't hide it.
4. Laura designed a champagne colored Grecian goddess party dress.
With her fabulous shoes and glamourous 'do, Laura looked exactly the "fabulously glamourous" that we have to hear her say every week in the opening credits. Quibbling about that little, tiny knot of fabric in the back for travel? Lame.
5. Michael brought on the Hamptons meets the 'Hood look
Although I questioned the all-white palette I did appreciate that Michael rocked the runway in his 80s zipper top that somehow still
