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YahooI was typing away, responding to KWiz's post in the forums, and I thought that it was such an intersting and relevant issue she raised (about the intra-racial dynamics within the black community and how it affects young women) that I would post my response here:
I think that this is a very important issue. I could write a whole book about my experiences coming to terms with my identity as a trans-racial adoptee growing up in a white family...in Canada....in a rural community.
I agree, the pain from being discriminated against by your own seems to hurt a lot more than from others, as there is an expectation of unity based on a shared cultural background. On the other hand, I think that for some, they have been ingrained to hate themselves, have observed that the outside world emphasizes what is more 'suitable' and some people are treated better than others because of the hue of their skin or texture of their hair. Some people buy into those stereotypes as a way to make sense of this crazy world. when I was a kid, Barbie dolls were all the rage, and I sure as hell couldn't relate to that!
To some, this is a survival technique - to others, it is a way to make themselves feel superior over others because they doubt their own abilities.This goes back to slavery and the residual affects of European colonialism in the Carribean and parts of Africa.
It is easier to buy into what you think is acceptable than to think on your own and treat When I was 18, I moved to a big city, hoping to meet and be accepted by other blacks and was sorely disapointed. To this day (I'm in my mid-thirties) I still struggle with not 'fitting in,' and though I have been very active in cultural groups and write about race & ethnicity, my lack of cultural roots is problematic to many people I have interacted with over the years.
Anyway, I will look forward to the evolution of this thread. Welcome aboard!
Shared socio-political backgrounds
Freddie Moorer February 8, 2007 - 12:15pm
I had a talk with a friend after our Bears lost to the Colts about why our friendship had lasted so long (more than 10 years). His response kind of surprised me so I will share it here.
Growing up black in American we shared some experiences that while not unique to America, was applied to us because of our color/skin hue. There were neighborhoods to which it was not prudent to go or be caught in after sunset if you were black -- even if you had school friends who lived in that neighborhood. Because of our shared negative experiences, a bond developed -- a stronger bond than that formed by positive experiences. He said we experience that bond as friendship but it is more a reminder that we can still experience discrimination because of our color at any time in America. We may not be able to protect each other but we can commiserate with each other in friendship.
I thought about what he said and I would like to think that friendship is more about like than any negative experience (we like football, etc.) but I also think he has a point. Shared experiences matter though I give equal value to both positive and negative experiences.
I hope one day share experiences do not include those prompted by race, class, or gender discrimination.
Freddie
Real Estate Professional
NJ Housing Report