Feeling sorry for "Psychos"

You bring up an interesting point.

Unfortunately, our society trains the "haves" to trample the "have nots". Yes, that can be remedied by parents paying close attention to their children and trying to teach them "the right thing", but a lot of this is learned on the playgrounds outside of the watchful eye of parents.

Society gives to the "haves" and takes.... or at least sanctions 'taking' from the "have nots". If you look at a crime show where something happens to a woman, if she was attractive, they play it up. They play up how it's such a tragedy that something happened to such a beautiful girl. OTOH, if she wasn't seen as (visually) attractive, you barely hear anything about her... IF they make a show about her at all.

It's the same thing with soap operas. I didn't realize until I started visiting the mid-west how unrealistic soap operas are. EVERYBODY on EVERY show is attractive, in shape, etc... unless there's a reason in the script for someone specifically to be fat or facially unattractive. Meanwhile, people are being trained that attractive=good and unattractive=bad. in-shape=good and out-of-shape=bad. Everyone considered to be "less than" others is fair game for ridicule, bullying, whatever, because everyone agrees that they're not deserving.

While, as you said, it's NO excuse whatsoever, I definitely empathize with the pressure that "have nots" are under... especially "have not" guys that would like to have at least a DECENT interaction with a female, but get ruthlessly shot down every time due to their looks or status. I can't relate to it at all, but I see why living like that, day in and day out might lead someone to snap and go off the deep end.
--
Bill Cammack
BillCammack.com
BlogHerBiz '07 Media

I usually can't get beyond my anger to summon up much compassion for the perpetrators of these kinds of crimes, but I do understand that they almost never happen in a vacuum. The things some children are exposed to are truly deplorable and that can't but help to contribute to extremely disturbed adults.

And Bill made a great point when he said,

Meanwhile, people are being trained that attractive=good and unattractive=bad. in-shape=good and out-of-shape=bad. Everyone considered to be "less than" others is fair game for ridicule, bullying, whatever, because everyone agrees that they're not deserving.

When the media consistently shows the "pretty people" as the "stars" of the world, everyone buys into that idea, including the "unattractive people." They start to believe that they can only ever be "supporting players" and to work toward more is useless. It's a very subtle message, but dangerously pervasive and girls are especially susceptible to it.

Regarding violence against women, I'm constantly amazed that you can't show loving nude sexual acts between men and women, but you can show the most disgusting and brutal violence against women. Check out what gets an "R" or "NC-17" rating and what passes for "PG-13" these days. It's very scary.

The media's not going to change, but our perceptions of it must. We need to watch and read entertainment as just that, not as a representative of real life. We need to teach children how to be discriminating viewers.

And more of us need to listen, listen, listen.

M. Smith
www.megansminute.com

I agree with you, and I am happy to read that I am not the only one feeling this way. Maybe it is because I have a brother with a mental illness, I see things from another poit of view (not that my bro has ever been violent) than most of the people around me.
Here in Belgium, a 16 yo killed tried to kill his school's principal a few months ago. Turns out he comes from Bosnia, he's been through horrible things during the war there, and doctors suspect he is mentally ill. And still, I hear most people and the media talking about him as of just some wacko who should be punished.
Of course he is guilty, but life made him the way he is, and he has a mother who must be so sad about how things turned out. How can we not think of that?