Parents get jail time for serving alcohol at teenage son's birthday party

I don't see anything wrong with the parents' logic. I'm sure they wouldn't have had too much difficulty finding the alcohol somewhere else - plus they would have been driving too, which makes it even more dangerous. Sure, it sounds bad with a headline that reads "parents get jail-time for serving alcohol," but would you say they're any worse than parents that would just let their kids go out and get drunk underage without any supervision? The only criminals here are the
teeth whitening ( http://www.malibubright.com ) companies that the kids are going to have to spend boatloads of money on to reverse the beer stains lol.

It's hard to make the right decision here, I am sure those parents meant no harm for their kids but they have also been imprudent allowing alcohol for the party. Instead of arresting parents that act isolated, the authorities should focus more on real drug providers, those who steal peoples lives providing drugs on a daily basis.
Narconon Vista Bay ( http://www.drugrehab.net/faq.php )

Tell me the percentage of young people drinking under the age of 21?
I can tell you it’s a lot. It’s so hypocrite, just pretend they are not drinking but you know they are. Let them drink somewhere else and let them drive home ‘DRUNK’, because they are to afraid to tell there parents to pick them up. The drunk driving accidents in the US are one of the highest of all western countries. This makes me so mad. She goes to prison but for all I know she maybe saved one little child that could have been killed because of a drunk driver.
What is happening in this country, let us please open our eyes.

While I think what the mother and step-father did was wrong, I think a 27-month jail sentence is way too harsh. This jail sentence has basically destroyed this family. The two boys are understandably distraught and the parents will go to jail for 2 plus years. The severity of the punishment does not fit the crime.

I agree with those who advocate a gradual introduction of alcohol to minors. Alcohol is a fact of life, and when it becomes forbidden fruit, people are more likely to over-indulge. Who would you rather introduce your child to alcohol--you or the college frat/sorority buddies? Alcohol education is a must and it should include no drinking/driving.

We are confused as a society. We preach the dangers of alcohol to our children, but we glamorize its consumption in movies, ads, and television. Kids aren't stupid. They know that adults enjoy alcohol regularly (and some, stupidly). Many of them want to try it, just because it is glamorized so much.

The Virginia law should be revamped. Wouldn't it be better for the parents to perform some community service work, perhaps work with children at risk, do something positive to give back to the community? I cannot see what good this sentence will do for anyone. Don't laugh, it's like putting someone in jail for jay-walking. "Well, if we put people in jail for jay-walking, then [other] people will understand that they can't jay walk."

Gambits from Gail ( http://www.gailanderson.org/ )

In Denmark we have no lower limit for alcohol consumption and a 16 year limit for alcohol purchase. Our youth has to go to the city hall once they turn 16 in order to obtain an ID-card, which confirms the age in shops. We are talking of access to al kind of alcohol, not only beer and wine.

Why do we have such laws? Because we wanted to lower the number of DUI conviction and not least the number of people killed on our roads. Our strategy is an success if you count 73 people killed due to alcohol related accidents during the entire year of 2006 an success and we are talking of a population of 5,000,000 people.

When does the Danish teens start to drink? According to a study about 20 percent of teens under 15 have been drunk several times before sobering up when they find out what good things in life they miss because they are unable to attend the activities because they are too drunk. In the summer groups of teens aged down to 12 are seen drinking in groups at parks and beaches always with a concerned parent in somewhat distance. Please notice. They are drinking with parental approval because if the parents buy, they can adjust the amount and they can address problems more freely because the teenagers does not have to hide their intake.
That is properly why we also avoid problems like teenage pregnancies and some of the violence. Violence does exist, but the majority of the convicted are people who can not drink due to religious reasons and therefore enjoy social interaction. They become marginalized and angry. Teenage pregnancies are so rare (The average age of a mother, who is giving birth is now late in the 20's, which cause other problems.) that we even have TV-series about the few.

Our only problem is that we are aware of is the pub-crawling journeys, who are sold all over Europe to Bulgaria. In the future we will inform our youth better, so they know that it is safer to avoid drinking and social interaction, while being on Holiday in another country. Just the last 14 days one Dane aged 17 have been killed because the drug the ice-cubes in the drinks so people are fooled to drink more than there health can take and 4 Danish women had been raped.

I think that your country should see to Europe for strategies and especially give the youth access to alcohol, which is a dangerous product. So dangerous in fact that adjusting to it is something that teenagers should use years to learn about before they can buy it on their own. We have saved 200 lives per year by learning our teenagers of the dangers. Just try to calculate how many lives you could save.

All I can say is that I'm glad we live in Spain.

As an expatriate Brit, I do however understand the obsession of a good part of the the English-speaking world with the Demon Drink. We just can't get away from the nightmare depicted in that famous Hogarth engraving "Gin Lane"

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Image:GinLane.jpg

What we never do, though, is check out its companion piece "Beer Street"

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Image:BeerStreet.jpg

where the artist extols the virtues of MODERATE drinking.
And there's the rub. If we continue with this puritanical line on booze - as in no drink, anytime, anywhere, until you're 21 - it will become, as is the nature of such things, doubly attractive merely for being prohibited.

Which brings me on to how things are handled in southern Europe (and elsewhere, as some of the above comments mention). Young people here (i.e. from about 15-16 up) are given tiny, watered-down amounts of beer or wine to have _with food_ (important point that) on special occasions.

And it works. Public drunkenness "a la inglesa" (or indeed "americana") is frowned on, and drinking straight from a bottle hidden in a brown-paper bag is something we associate with, yes, Hollywood films featuring "bad" high school kids.

There IS a problem with drink driving here, due mainly to enduringly daft attitudes on mixing the two, but that's now sharply on the decrease thanks to rigourous enforcement by the police.

What you don't see here is pickled sixteen-year olds getting into nasty street fights over some perceived slight and/or waking up at first light in a pool of their own vomit.

I will be thinking of poor Elisa Kelly as I go out this December to buy the food and drink for my daughter's 18th birthday party, which we're holding at home, with a sleepover, for EXACTLY the same reason as Mrs Kelly.

The big difference is that neither my wife nor I will be going to prison as a result.

I am a 19 yr old college student and have experienced every aspect of this issue.

When i was younger and parents were completely against us drinking we were ALOT more irresponsible about it then we are today with our parents realizing were going to do it regardless of thier wishes. When we "werent supposed" to drink, drunk driving was veryyy common amoung kids my age. Since we couldnt drink at each others houses, we would have to sneak around and drink in private before a party or get together. And after these parties we had to drive home intoxicated so it appeared as if we were sober.

Recently, our parents have accepted us drinking and will ocassionaly provide us alcohol. Having them provide it is a lot safer. Since we are going to find a way to get it regardless, they might as well get it for us rather then have us go out with fake ids to find a shady gas station to sell to us.

Also, drinking at a house with parents knowning whats going on is alot safer then sneaking around. If they know we are drinking they will know NOT to let anyone drive. Since i am now allowed to drink, i have been ALOT safer about it. If i am out drinking i will let my mom know and promise to stay at the house im drinking at instead of trying to hide and and make my way home.

I believe that as long as parents talk with their kids about safe drinking (ie. not overdoing it, not driving), it is acceptable to allow underage drinking and ocasionally provide alcohol. Lets face it, kids ARE going to drink no matter what and as long as parents know whats going on they can monitor everything and make sure their kids are being safe about it

but do disagree with it in part.

The rules we set for alcohol were quite strigent and monitored closely... in other words we were there, and the only minor having a drink was our daughter.

As others have expressed, total abstinence is not really a fully workable policy on a broad scale, just as it is with sex.

Some kids won't go near alcohol at all. Others will. Yet for those that do, they will have had absolutely zero preparation on maturely and moderately handling alcohol, what is appropriate and what is not.

In my experience it is easier to keep kids from driving than it is from drinking, but we don't ban driving, we teach them how to do so properly. Education is *always* the key.

Giving a teen parameters for making their own choices teaches responsibility in a setting where they can learn, instead of an uncontrolled one where people can die.

When I was 14, another of our neighbourhood, 16 and his father the town police chief... was in a car where they were drinking. They were doing like 60 on a winding town road, and he had a beer bottle between his legs. A tree got in the way, and that bottle seriously carved him. He lived two months before dying, a shell of his former self. I will never forget that wake.

Those of us in this neighbourhood, we started early. I had my first beer in the eighth grade, and I was 13 when starting the 9th grade. No one taught us anything, and it showed. We learned the hard way.

Every parent will decide what is best. I cannot sanction or condone serving alcohol or allowing alcohol to be consumed by anyone other than one's own child, no matter if consent is given. This increases the potential variables, and such an increase rapidly makes it unmanageable... but if we teach our own children, not by teaching them they should drink, only that if you are curious, here is the setting in which to satisfy that curiosity, here is the setting in which to learn to do so responsibly. IMO, we accomplish more than building walls that leave them carrying, for lack of a better term, an insatiable desire to satisfy their thirst.

nelle ( http://nelle2nelle.typepad.com/swim_beyond_the_ima... )

I do not agree with serving minors alcohol at all.

I will let these stats speak for themselves as to why.

Underage Drinking Fact Sheet:

65% of underage drivers get their alcohol from parents or friends.

In 2004, among 15- to 20-year-old drivers, 29 percent of the drivers who were killed in motor vehicle crashes had been drinking. Additionally, for the same year and age group, 24 percent of these young drivers had BAC levels of .08 or higher.

Young drivers are over represented in both alcohol- and non-alcohol-related fatality rates. Alcohol-related fatality rates are nearly twice as high for 18-, 19- and 20-year-olds as for the population over 21. More than 40 percent of 18-, 19-, and 20- year-old crash fatalities are alcohol-related.

* Underage drinking remains a persistent problem among youth, though there are signs progress is being made. According to the 2005 National Survey on Drug Use and Health, about 10.8 million Americans between ages 12-20 report current alcohol consumption; this represents nearly 28% of this age group for whom alcohol use is illegal. Although there have been some declines in underage drinking from 2004 to 2005, since 2002, past month alcohol consumption has remained relatively unchanged among 12-20 year olds.
o Of these youth, nearly 7.2 million (19%) reported having engaged in binge drinking and 2.3 million (6%) in heavy drinking. More males than females aged 12 to 20 reported current alcohol consumption (29% v. 28%), binge drinking (21% v. 16%) and heavy drinking (8% v. 4%) in 2005.
o These rates of consumption reported in the 2005 National Survey on Drug Use and Health are similar to estimates reported in the 2002, 2003 and 2004. However, there were slight declines in past month consumption and binge drinking among 12- to 17-year olds between 2004 and 2005.
o Among older age groups, the prevalence of current alcohol consumption decreased with increasing age, however, among America's youth the rate of current alcohol consumption increases with increasing age according to the 2005 survey, from 3% at age 12 to 6% at age 13, 11% at age 14, 20% at age 15, 27% at age 16, 33% at age 17, 44% at age 18, 52% at age 19, and 58% at age 20. The rate reaches a peak at 69% among persons 21 years old.
o In 2005, more male than female 12- to 20-year olds reported current alcohol consumption (29% v. 28%, respectively), binge drinking (21% v. 16%), and heavy drinking (8% v. 4%). Unfortunately, among youths 12- to 17- years old, the percentage of females who report drinking in the past 30 days remains slightly, although not significantly, higher compared to their male peers (17% for females compared with 16% for males). However, the 2005 rate of current alcohol consumption among 12- to 17-year old males and females represents a decline from the 2004 rates — the one year decline among males was significant.
* According to the National Institute on Drug Abuse (NIDA), first use of alcohol is typically reported to begin around age 12.
* According to the National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism (NIAAA), children who begin drinking before the age of 15 have a four times greater chance of becoming alcoholic as an adult than those who begin at 21, the legal drinking age.
* Progress continues to be made in the fight against underage drinking according to the 2004-05 Pride Survey. The National Summary of the Pride Survey, again recorded an all time low level, and a statistically significant decrease, in the number of students who reported they drank alcohol in the past year.
* According to the 19th Annual Pride Survey, among all students in grades 6 to 12, reported annual and monthly consumption of any alcohol product decreased significantly from the previous school year. Annual consumption rates decreased from 47.2 percent in the 2004-05 school year to 45.4 in 2005-06 — a statistically significant decrease and record low level. Monthly consumption decreased from 22.5 percent in 2004-05 to 21.4 in the current survey school year — a statistically significant one year decrease.
* The 2006 Monitoring the Future study also showed declining alcohol consumption among American youth, although, alcohol consumption continues to be widespread among today's youth. The prevalence measures (lifetime and annual) for alcohol consumption showed significant decline among 12th graders.
* Four out of ten students have consumed alcohol at least once by the end of eighth grade and slightly more than seven out of ten students have done so by the end of high school. That is, 41% of eighth grade students, 62% of tenth graders, and 73% of twelfth graders report they have tried alcohol. The figures represent a lifetime alcohol consumption decline of nearly one percentage point among 8th graders, declines of nearly two percent among 10th graders and two percentage points among 12th graders, a statistically significant one-year decline over the past year for high school seniors.
* Additionally, the 2006 Monitoring the Future survey revealed a statistically significant decline in the annual rate of alcohol consumption 12th graders from 2005 to 2006, with all three grade levels reaching record low levels over the past decade. Annual consumption among 8th grade and 10th grade students declined only slight from 2005 to 2006, while 12th grade students' annual prevalence declined two percentage points from 68.6 to 66.5. Annual consumption rates among 8th and 10th graders for 2006 were 34% and 56%, respectively.
* Thirty-day alcohol consumption remained relatively unchanged among 8th and 10th graders with prevalence rates of 17% and 34%, respectively. Although not statistically significant, past 30-day alcohol consumption rates declined nearly two percent among high school seniors from 47% in 2005 to 45.3% in 2006, a new record low. Additionally, binge drinking (having five or more drinks in a row) decreased nearly two percent among 12th graders in 2006, marking another historical low level at 27%.
* The one-year one percentage point declines noted in the 2006 Monitoring the Future Study, while not always statistically significant, are notable because they reflect a longer-term gradual decline in underage drinking.
* A qualitative research study conducted by Amica Insurance confirmed that teenagers whose parents talk with them versus talk at them might be less at risk to engage in harmful behavior involving alcohol. What's more, teens said they would be more apt not to drink and drive if they had heard directly from their parents how important they are to them.
* Only one in four teens in America (27 percent, about 6.5 million) lives with "hands-on" parents — parents who have established a household culture of rules and expectations for their teen's behavior and monitor what their teens do: such as the TV shows they watch, the CD's they buy, what they access on the Internet, and where they are spending evenings and weekends. These teens are at one quarter the risk of smoking, drinking and using drugs when compared with teens who have "hands-off" parents, according to a new survey of 1,000 American teens ages 12-17 conducted by The National Center on Addiction and Substance Abuse at Columbia University (CASA).
* According to the most recent wave of The TRU Study (Fall 2005) from Teenage Research Unlimited, drinking and driving continues to be an issue of great importance to teens. Three-fourths of teens (75%) cite drunk driving as an issue they care about, making it one of teens' top life-and-death issues and ranking it third overall, following education and child abuse and ahead of such issues as war, terrorism, economy, environment, drug abuse, cigarette smoking, racism, and abortion.
* Young drivers are over represented in both alcohol- and non-alcohol-related fatality rates. Alcohol-related fatality rates are nearly twice as high for 18-, 19- and 20-year-olds as for the population over 21. More than 40 percent of 18-, 19-, and 20- year-old crash fatalities are alcohol-related.
* In 2005 approximately 31.7 million people aged 12 and older drove under the influence of alcohol at least once during the past year. These data reflect a decrease of more than five percent from the 33.5 million persons reporting drinking in driving in the 2002 National Survey of Drug Use and Health. Driving under the influence of alcohol continues to be associated with age, with a peak among 21- to 25-year olds (28%).
o Eight percent of 16- and 17-year olds reported driving under the influence, and 20% of 18- to 20-year olds reported engaging in this behavior at least once in the past year.
* In 2004, among 15- to 20-year-old drivers, 29 percent of the drivers who were killed in motor vehicle crashes had been drinking. Additionally, for the same year and age group, 24 percent of these young drivers had BAC levels of .08 or higher.
* For young drivers age 15 to 20, alcohol involvement is higher among males than females. In 2004, 26 percent of young male drivers involved in fatal crashes had been drinking at the time of the crash, compared with 12 percent of young female drivers involved in fatal crashes.

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Growing up in our home, my parents had a beer after golf. Additionally, special dinners (C&E) included wine (some of it pretty awful) and each kid got a glass -a small glass. Perhaps they thought that feeding us bad wine would mitigate a blantant disrepect for the substance. So, the C&E events were relatively benign with the kids animately choking at the table, never finishing the wine.

Later, I do remember being emphatically against my parents when it came to my high school graduation party. I refused to have alcohol available because we had a swimming pool and most students at that time were already alcoholics. I simply didn't want the responsibility and the guilt that came with driving and potential death. Funny thing, the kids came back after making the party rounds and said that our party was the most fun.

I am disappointed that folks seem to have gone the extreme and won't let their kids have a glass of wine on special occasions or let them learn to drive before they're 18. I'm the belief that knowledge [of every kind] is power and kids should be allowed to slowly get introduced to adulthood with controlled and proper supervision. I've seen students during their first year at school get released from parental strangulation and just go nuts. Unfortunately, this is extremely unproductive and incredibly destructive.

Today, my husband and I enjoy wine nightly. We appreciate it, we learn about it, we cook with it, and most of all, we respect it. Once that bottle is open, we know we're in for the night -sans driving.

Lisa, Creative Goddess
----------------------------------------
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Do you think the fact that the step-father was involved in the incident, rather than the biological father affected the media's coverage?

In my extended family it was an accepted thing. My aunts and uncles all allowed their kids to bring friends over to drink at the house. I was included in that group. Alcohol was a part of life in their homes, they grew up with it, they drank it regularly and their children drank as well. It's a cycle. I don't think it ever occured to them that they were doing anything wrong. I believe they honestly thought they were doing the responsible thing by having the kids at the house. If you grew up in a home where alcohol was not present or present only for special occasions then you wouldn't understand the mindset. I don't agree with it, but I can understand where this mother was coming from.

I would guess that the case with this family is similar. The family probably is used to having alcohol around. It's probably a normal thing. "Grab some beer" is probably something that is said on any occassion for celebration. There is probably always some kind of alcoholic beverage in the refrigerator...that atmosphere makes a big difference.

Where I live it is legal for sixteen-year-olds to buy and consume beer and wine. The idea, I guess, is that it is important for youth to learn in their homes the benefits of moderate use of alcohol: before they learn to drive (generally done at 18 years) or go out on their own to college.

My son, who is 17, and most of his friends don't drink alcohol, even though they have tried it on the occasion. There are others in his class, the cool gang, who do drink often and hard. The others don't feel any pressure though to follow. Since beer and wine are not "forbidden fruit" there is no mystical attraction to overindulge (or at least in theory).

Whether lowering the legal age helps to create more moderate drinkers, I really don't know. But, in the case you are writing about, the realistic expectations of the party guests could have been met, an open dialog about moderate consumption could have occurred, the host's parents would not have had to lie to the other parents, and the mother would not be in jail.

lia from luebeck, germany

Author of the media safe 101 ( http://rtb03mediasafe.blogspot.com/ ) page on the Red Tent Blog ( http://virtualredtent.blogspot.com ) and the personal yum yum cafe ( http://yumyumcafe.blogspot.com/ )

First of all, it was not too bright to serve alchohol to teenagers, I think we probably all can agree to that. What interests me more in your post, Nordette, is the question of why the mother took most of the blame/responsibility in the media's eyes.

Today's culture sems to have reduced fathering to a peripheral role, what with the emphasis on getting ahead in the world and making as much money as possible. Fathers need to be more involved in their children's lives, then maybe they will start picking up more of the blame/responsibility (and credit) for what their children do (or what they do to their children, as in this case).

In this case, both parents certainly bore joint responsibilty for the poor judgement (why didn't we hear from the father in the newspaper article?), so the mother should not be singled out for blame. Society does bear some of the blame, however, for the backseat role fathers often play in their children's lives, and that needs to change.

When my eldest was a teen, she was allowed to have an alcoholic beverage - 1 - in our home. No one, and I mean no one else was allowed, I don't care if parents said ok or not. In addition, if she did have that drink, she was not to leave our home the remainder of that night.

Alcohol is a fact of adult life, and we do a very poor job of educating our young on how to transition to that responsibility.

Throwing a party for a herd of teens is irresponsible and negligent. Does it merit 27 months in jail? IMO, no. I know we wish to show this is no joke, not to be taken lightly, but if we start tossing sentences at every problem we face as a society, well... we will have more jails than schools.

We have a love & hate relationship with alcohol - and other drugs. We use them and then react adversely to irresponsible usage. Yet we fail to educate, to prepare. We do hypocritical things like send 18 year olds to fight and die, yet preclude them from having a beer.

We aren't going to eliminate the use of alcohol... but we can teach with use comes responsibility. We can teach that use in moderation is not evil, but that excess, as with most things, leads to both self harm and harm to others.

This sentence is a huge huge mistake. Fear is never a proper motivator - understanding and accepting is.

nelle ( http://nelle2nelle.typepad.com/swim_beyond_the_ima... )