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In this week’s Ten Money Questions we speak with Cynthia Friedlob. Cynthia blogs as The Thoughtful Consumer and last year wrote, Sorting It Out: One Disorganized Woman Solves the Problem of Too Much Stuff, a book about her efforts to unclutter her home and simplify her life. Since “stuff†costs money, I wanted her thoughtful views on spending, consuming and less equals more. Enjoy what follows!
1. Step 2 of your 3-step plan to reclaim our long-lost consumer sanity is to distinguish between need and want when buying. Isn’t everything a want after the basics of food, clothing and shelter?
Technically, that’s true. But let’s take that concept to its extremes. Consider a homeless woman living in a cardboard box in an alley, wearing the only clothing she has, living off of scraps of food scrounged from trash cans and the occasional meal in a shelter. She may have enough to stay alive, but none of us would consider her someone who’s having those basic needs of food, clothing and shelter adequately met. So, assuming there’s some way for her to earn enough money for more of anything (already a big assumption), how much more does she “need?†A room to live in? An apartment? A house? A wardrobe? How many items of clothing? From the local mall or from a designer boutique? Enough money to buy food at the neighborhood grocery store? Enough to buy organic food? Enough for occasional imported chocolates?
Now let’s consider the other end of the extreme. I just wrote a post in which I made a reference to a woman who estimated that she owned five hundred pairs of shoes. I think I’d be hard pressed to find anyone who could explain the “need†for five hundred pairs of shoes and I would hope that the majority of us would question why anyone would even “want†that many. But at what point did this shopper want “too many†shoes? At five pair? Ten? Fifty?
There’s a gap, no, there’s a huge chasm between the people in those two circumstances. The tricky issue is defining where the line is that separates “need†from “want.†I think it’s a pretty wide line, somewhere in the middle of that chasm, and everyone falls on a different place on it. I advocate choosing to land on the part of the wide line where your needs are met well enough to make you feel safe and comfortable, you’re able to function in your job and your social life, but you own far fewer than five hundred pairs of shoes. The operative word is “choosing†and that requires awareness. I believe that most of us “need†far less than we think we do and we often “want†things without analyzing why we want them.
But I don’t personally advocate what is usually considered a minimalist lifestyle. I’ll leave that to No Impact Man! It would be hypocritical of me to suggest that everyone should give up most of their creature comforts and abandon the trappings of civilization. I like many of those trappings! Our big screen TV is a wonderful thing, however I don’t delude myself into believing that it’s a need.
I think that’s really what The Thoughtful Consumer is about: not deluding ourselves about what we need. I’d simply like us to think, seriously consider our choices, before we buy something. I’d like us to think of other ways we might use that money that could be wiser or more satisfying in the long run. I’d like us to become aware if we’re shopping mindlessly or as an escape, or if we’re using “stuff†as a way to validate ourselves; awareness is the first step to finding an alternative that’s more appropriate. I’d like us to be as generous as we can, whenever we can. And I’d like us to understand how our shopping choices and our perceptions of what we supposedly need are profoundly influenced by advertising and marketing. If we do these things, I believe that we’ll make much better choices -- better for us personally, for society and for the environment.
By the way, notice I said “us.†I, too, am not immune to self-delusion or clever marketing tactics or poor choices. I just try very hard to minimize my errors!
2. What is your most significant memory about money?
When I first moved to Los Angeles thirty years ago, like many young people, I was on a
