This June, I sat in a college athletic center, uncomfortable on bleachers but hardly noticing because of the pride I felt. I teared up as a particular very tall boy walked in to the strains of "Pomp and Circumstance" to receive his high school diploma. I went down to the floor with my digital point-and-shoot to wait with all the relatives holding video cameras and setting up tripods. (Tripods!) He tells me I didn't embarrass him, and in fact he was looking to see where I was.

(There I am on the left. He's in the middle, and my mother is on the right.)

He's not my child. He's my cousin, the son of my father's youngest brother - and my godson. Eighteen years ago I stood up in church - 18 myself, at the time - and promised to support his spiritual growth along with his parents. His dad is only 11 years older than I am, so I grew up more as a little sister than a niece.

I don't have children of my own. Hopefully I can add "yet" on the end of that, but I try not to play head games like that. It just hasn't happened for me, for a variety of reasons - the primary one being that I haven't ended up in a relationship solid enough to support the serious responsibility of parenting, and I haven't felt ready yet to do it on my own.

I'm not at all ambivalent about this. I really want to be a mother, to the point that I really struggle with this issue as the clock ticks and I haven't yet found myself in a situation that would support bearing or adopting a child. The stress of questions and suggestions about this situation is a post, nay, a book, in itself - not what I want to focus on here, but it's a critical part of the backstory, so to speak. Beacuse in the meantime, I live a full life that children are very much a part of, and I plan to make sure that this is always the case. They just happen to belong to other people - specifically my family members and friends, who have been generous enough to allow me to take roles of varying degrees in the lives of their kids. (I've been known to offer bribes, and I'll also push strollers and placate with candy, so there's that.)

My relationship with Michael is the most formal, I guess, marked by the holiday gifts and presence at milestone events that are typical for godparents. Others, like my relationship with my cousin's 4-year-old son, weren't sealed with holy water, but are no less important. I hang out with him, and watch him on occasion while his parents play softball. We play, and chatter, and I'm aware of special events in his life and where he'll be heading to pre-kindergarten this fall. My friends' children, likewise, are special to me. I talk to them on the phone when I call their moms, and I go to their birthday parties. They call me "Miss Laurie" and "Auntie Laurie" and occasionally, "What's up, Yo?" It's all good with me. I see their MySpace pages when Mom and Dad might not. They sit next to me on purpose at dinner.

I love it, and so I make room for them in my life, too. When I have parties, kids are welcome, and as I've gotten older, more and more of my friends need to be able to bring their kids with them either by choice or because babysitters aren't available or desirable. And when I go shopping with mom or have dinner with couples, it's always fine with me if the little people are there. Just because I don't have a family of my own spouse and children doesn't mean I lack an understanding of its importance, or can't hang with other people in theirs.

I honestly wouldn't have this any other way. I believe that having a wide range of contacts with people from all age groups is essential in my life. As the oldest child and grandchild on both sides of my family, I'm very comfortable with helping out with care and feeding, as well as the fun stuff.

I think this benefits the kids and parents in my life too, as well as it benefits me. I hope and believe that the parents who are important to me feel comfortable integrating their kids into our "grown-up" relationships, on whatever level makes sense for them. And doing my part in this regard means knowing when to help out and knowing when to back off. It means keeping my mouth shut when it should be, and not giving (much! I swear!) unsolicited advice. I also don't show up as the thirtysomething, 2007, equivalent of Auntie Mame, either, when I do show up. Of COURSE I have coloring books around, but those are for me, and even if I could afford it, I wouldn't displace my own maternal feelings by bringing along expensive toys or stuff the kids don't need. I do consider the buying of cool gifts to be one of my particular specialties when the time is right, and sometimes it's not just at holiday and birthday time, but I want them to TALK to me - not just be hoping for the "look, shiny!" moment when Laurie walks in the house.

The bottom line is that If you're genuinely cool, kids know it. And what they know the most, and I've found they really value, is if you truly care about them. You don't have to - and you shouldn't - try too hard. I do share a lot of books with the very important kids in my life though, because that's just a good thing. And I have to admit that when I saw my godson's 14-year-old sister reading the first Harry Potter book on the beach this summer, it touched me deeply when she said, "You got these for Michael when he was little and now I'm reading them."

My life would be so much less without these relationships that I can't even imagine it. I feel fuller when the children who belong to the people who are special to me tell me about their lives, when they give me hugs, and when they do things like save that extra graduation ticket for me. And I'm fully aware that this is my preference and it works for me like it might not work for others who are not parents. I just refuse to live a "child-free" life just because I don't have children. Yet. It's a good thing I don't have to.

Here are some other people in the blogosphere who take the children in their lives seriously:

Nicole in London is the coolest aunt on the planet.

Lil Mama at Life and Times of a Mama didn't want to leave anyone out of the godparent role for her daughter, so she picked four!

(It was a) little untraditional but it felt right. All four, each with their own special contribution to Maddie's life, is a blessing to our family.

Gidget from Adventures of the Eternal Student has been hanging out with her nephew quite a bit, and it's safe to say there's some bonding going on:

He's been more affectionate of late, and always looks for "Tita Nis" (his nickname for me) whenever he gets home from school. Earlier this evening, he said "I love you, Tita Nis." So, I said, "I love you, Aidan." Then he said, "I'll tell you how much," as he pulled my head to whisper in my ear. "I love you forever."

I wish I could record such moments so that in the future, when he doesn't think I'm so cool anymore and refuses to hang out with me, I can hold him to what he said. (Like I actually could, right?)

Lyre Lyre Pants on Fire is in my boat, with a godchild who suddenly became a teenager, who was recently part of a day that was great for six reasons she could list.

two very important people called me to tell me that they loved me: my 16 year old godchild and my son's godbabymama. It feels so wonderful to be loved.

The Odd Broad wasn't leaving it to chance that she wouldn't be her new nephew's godmother.

This demure attitude didn't last long, however; earlier this month I bought Sissy a picture frame that says "I love my Godchild." She was amused: "Shouldn't you keep this frame, though?" "No," I explained, "I want you to display it in The Tadpole's room, with a picture of me holding him or her."

I am head over heels crazy for this child already and cannot wait to lavish him or her with toys and gifts, and cute onesie outfits with catchphrases like, "Nobody Puts Baby in the Corner."

If you haven't already caught on, Dear Reader, The Odd Broad has been feeling rather maternal lately. And not just with cute dogs, cats and other people's children.

So is Kate at Girl Uninterrupted, who is just getting the hang of this kind of campaign:

My brother and his girlfriend are having a baby next March or April. It’s early days yet, but I’m already excited.

I’ve known for a week, but there were certain key family members who hadn’t yet been clued in, so I had to keep quiet. But now that they know… I’M GOING TO BE AN AUNT!!!

I never thought my brother would have kids before me. But I can accept it, and I’ll be starting the campaign to be named godmother shortly.

From now on, you may address me as Auntie Kate.

Laurie White blogs at LaurieWrites.