Playing the odds
by Mir Kamin

I have a confession to make: My name is Mir, and I'm... well... I'm a recovering infertile.

Most people (women in particular, if I may be so bold as to gender stereotype) who've been through infertility will tell you that you can recover, but it never really goes away. I myself have two gorgeous (biological) kids, and am (quite happily) post-hysterectomy, but I am still, in my mind, an infertile. And reading infertility blogs is one of my vices; not because I'm still there, but because I admire the women still working their way through with so much more grace than I ever had.

Julie at a little pregnant often takes my breath away, and this weekend was no exception.

This post about considering another pregnancy in the face of a 20% chance of complications is just heart-wrenching.

Julie begins:

We agreed that 50's too high. The 50% chance of a recurrence of HELLP, the 50% chance of an extremely premature baby - too high, too foolish to try. I asked Paul what number would make sense. "5%," he answered promptly. "Five is easy, just like 50. 20 would be harder."

And it is.

And although, as usual, she speaks eloquently and not without humor about the issues at hand, it's sometimes the simplest statements that cut to the quick:

We think we know what hurts, and then something worse hurts more.

I wish I knew something to say to comfort Julie, and others, who are still in the middle of this journey towards completing their families. I don't. But I am awed and humbled that they share with us as they go along.

Comments

 

Hey Mir!

Good of you to join us!

I've never been where those folks are and their stories are inspiring and heartbreaking and inspiring again - every single day.

~Denise