I didn't know what it meant. I knew it was sexual. I thought it had something to do with sex but I didn't understand the context. So I swing over to the Urban Dictionary and there it was, Fwap. Basically the sound of a male having solo sex. A-Ha. But this generates more questions inside of my head.

About gender language, permission, acceptance and prohibitions on providing education on sexual literacy topics. So I had to go look up what sexual literacy is (not easy to find let me tell you). Sexual Literacy, according to the National Sexuality Resource Center is:

Knowledge needed to advance and protect one's own sexual health and well-being.

And further more they propose that:

• • Sexuality is about health, intimacy, desire, and protection.
  • Sexuality is more than just the 'sex act.'
  • Sexual literacy, the knowledge needed to advance and protect one’s own sexual health and well-being, is vital.
  • Accessible information and resources are essential for healthy discussions, education, and decision-making about sexuality.

So your saying to yourself, that's cool but what has that got to do with Fwap, Fwap, Fwap? May is National Masturbation Month. I'm sure it is some other kind of month too but roll with me for a moment. To my understanding, there is no female equivalent for the onomatopoeic sound of a woman making time with Roscoe or Rosie Palmer. Not talking about our breaths, throats or electronic assistance (special shout out to the OhMiBod.)

And more specifically, there is very little open discussion about what women think, feel, know about masturbation unless we go looking for it. And even then we turn to books, magazines and only very recently to blogs to backfill missing information.

Dr. Joycelyn Elders knows a little something about being open and getting swept up in a sexual paranoia backlash. Dr. Elders was the Surgeon General under the Clinton administration. She was asked a question. She answered it. She was fired. This video is her perspective on the need for talking honestly about sex education and how she got fired.

Betty Dodson is 79 years old. Betty Dodson is also the author of the classic book "Sex for One". Dr. Lori Buckley interviewed Betty, you can listen to the podcast or read the transcript of their conversation. Here is a portion of their discussion:

...So even though you started this in the 60's and 70's, young girls are reading your books today and know who you are and they feel okay. You've taken away some of that shame about how women and girls feel about their bodies, their vulvas, masturbation. I mean that is so powerful!

Betty Dodson: It's pretty basic stuff, isn't it?

Dr. Lori Buckley: You know, it should be basic. Why do you think so many people have a difficult time with that? Talking about it.

Betty Dodson: This society is based on rules and principles and guidelines. You know, "thou shalt not". I guess basically what it is, if we have independent orgasms, we’ll end up having independent thoughts. Thank god!

Comedienne Jen Kirkman has a funny video on her process of preparing for her hand jive: I would suggest that the audio is NSFW. One of the things I appreciate about it is that the humor is real but I can't think of the last time I heard a woman talk about solo sex out loud.

You know, this is more challenging than I thought. I know there are sex bloggers who are writing about solo sex and body acceptance issues. I came up with spammers and trolls. I know there are sex fiction bloggers who are experimenting with various forms of solo sex erotica. Can't find them.

I welcome you comments and ideas on other safe places to visit gain more information on female creativity and perspectives on masturbation, blogging style. The sound of our own fwap, fwap, fwap may be inaudible but it shouldn't be this silent.

CE Gena Haskett also writes at Out On The Stoop and PCCLibTech

Additional Resources:

• Violet Blue has a great post on making sure that you purchase safe sex toys.
• If you want to know how great, great, great-grandma got it on check out Good Vibrations article on the Antique Vibrator Museum.
• How sexually literate are you? Find out at the National Sexuality Resource Center's Sex Literacy Quiz.
• For Teens looking for good sex education resources Scarleteen. For Parents looking for good sex education resources check out Scarleteen's parents page.
• Good Healthy Sex Masturbation forum contains sex information between participants and medical professionals. So far a low spam/troll input rate.