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Several years ago I was talking to some heterosexual friends about the need for more health information and support for GLBT people because there was very little accurate info out there and even less support. They looked at me blankly. "But there's all sorts of HIV and AIDS info and support. What do you mean there isn't any information or support?" Let me fill you in on a secret, if a lesbian wants to talk to you about GLBT health issues it's pretty likely that HIV/AIDS doesn't make her Top 5 list. HIV/AIDs is important to us but it's not the only issue. I'll tell you a story or three, just to give you an idea of what my friends and I have experienced...
The very first time I really understood "homophobia in healthcare" was when my online friend, "Ky", was diagnosed with Non-Hodgkin's Lymphoma. She was being treated at a Catholic hospital in Oregon and the only way her partner was allowed in during "non-visiting hours" was if she was listed as immediate family. Neither "Ky" or her partner wanted people to think they were sisters, YUK. So they lied on the forms and said that "A" was her cousin. For several years "Ky" fought this illness and all of the way through it, they had to lie. When "Ky" died, they were still lying, though some staff members had figured it out by then. The idea that they lied their way through years of chemo and lied their way through death... this still haunts me.
And then, there's my friend "S" who was really excited and happy about her new relationship. She and her new g/f decided that it was important to both of them that they take their relationship to the next level with a clean bill of health, so they headed to their respective doctors for a check up that included STD and HIV testing. "S" visited a clinic in England and when she explained the reason for her visit, her doctor asked about birth control. "S" explained that she was going to be having sex with a woman, so that wasn't necessary. The doctor clicked his tongue, carried on without another word and all was fine until "S" was about to leave. The doctor asked her to wait while he rummaged around in a cabinet. Then, with a very large smile on his face, presented her with condoms, sample birth control pills and a supply of "the morning after pill". When she said again that she didn't need those, he laughed out loud and said women always change their mind, especially pretty women like her... the right man would come along.
My own personal experience with homophobia in healthcare has been pretty insignificant, relatively speaking. My g/f has a chronic illness and it has caused her to be hospitalized a couple of times over the last few years. Sometimes it is amusing to be asked if I am TW's mother (I am six years older than she is) or her sister or her "friend". Sometimes it isn't amusing at all. It isn't amusing when you explain that this very sick person who you love and are worried about is your partner and that expression comes over a nurse's face or a doctor's face, the one that lets you know right away how they REALLY feel about you. That expression, no matter how rarely it is seen, can leave you wondering about the quality of care that's about to be provided and it's always in the back of your mind the next time you seek care. You simply never know when you're going to see that expression cross someone's face.
Here are some links to information that can help you understand some of the health issues facing GLBT people:
- Diversity 101: A Primer on GLBT Healthcare (This is an excellent videocast!)
- GLBT Health Access Report
This month I'll be posting a lot about GLBT health, AIDs/HIV isn't the only issue we live with, not by a long shot.
~~Denise
Daily Dose of Denise
image credit: GLBT Healthcare Access
