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Last week was Ezzo Week 2006 over at Tulip Girl. She's "raising awareness about the concerns with the philosophy of parenting promoted by Gary Ezzo." Tulip Girl's annual Ezzo Week coincides with Gary Ezzo's Growing Families International National Leadership & Alumni Conference, which does not welcome the media.
No media allowed? Red flag, anybody?
Tulip Girl and her friends are raising many red flags about Gary and Anne Marie Ezzo and the parenting advice found in their books Babywise and Childwise. Unfortunately, Ezzo and his ministry are endorsed by many Church leaders so his influence is far-reaching.
As Zatera Ul explains, "There are plenty of things wrong with his books, from bad theology to bad breastfeeding advice, and woe to the infants who do not take well to the 'routines' (which generally turn into rigid schedules) that Ezzo dictates as God’s way."
Homebody of Finding My Way Home writes:
"The Ezzo method is quite popular in the military community, so we watched quite a few families using it. And everything we saw convinced us that BabyWise was not wise, not in the least."
Gid makes this suggestion to Christian parents:
"Make sure you know who Ezzo is so that when he and his books are brought up in conversations at church you will be able to speak intelligently about topics such as Failure to Thrive, Loss of Milk Production, Lies about Family beds (remember they use to call SIDs "Crib Death" for a reason), Cry it out, and Gary Ezzo's 2 Excommunications."
Some of her links are to articles on Ezzo.info, a "collection of resources" and links to articles written about Ezzo's writings and teachings. The site explains the general problem with Ezzo's teachings:
"Babywise and it's church-based counterpart, Preparation for Parenting, promote a one-size-fits-all set of parent-centered rules for sleep, feedings, and wake time. Contrary to their claims, these precepts are potentially unhealthy for the child, and leave parents focused on the clock, the rules, and the book, rather than on what their individual baby needs in order to grow and develop physically and emotionally."
Goldie of Curious Goldie's Suburban Adventures explains that Ezzo's techniques actually do make a lot of sense. When they are applied to a dog. She makes a compelling argument why this is true, although she also writes: "I confess, though, that I still have not fully embraced Ezzo’s techniques. I don’t spank my dog. Embarrassing but true."
About scheduling feedings, Greasy Joan of Keel the Pot writes:
"While I have more in common than not with the Ezzos, I find it's a leap of the post hoc ergo propter hoc variety to claim that failure to follow a feeding schedule in infancy therefore condemns the poor baby to all manner of brathood. Albeit, for many moms (busy ones, babies with low weight gain, overactive milk ejection) a flexible feeding routine can be beneficial. I've used them myself and am not opposed to them."
And Tulip Girl wants to make it clear that she is critical of Ezzo and not of the parents who believe in his techniques:
I'm outspokenly critical of Gary Ezzo and his parenting ideas. I want it to be plain that's what I am--critical of a set of ideas or "philosophy" as Ezzo calls it—not critical of parents who love their children and are seeking to raise them with truth and love.
There's so much more about Ezzo and links to other blog posts from Tulip Girls posts. I urge you to check them out here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, and here.
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BlogHer Contributing Editor Mary Tsao also blogs at Mom Writes.
Image credit: Bugwood.
Hat tip to The Baby Blawg for the link to Tulip Girl.
Babywise - don't knock it until you've tried it.
higherstillstables August 12, 2008 - 10:25am
My 10 month old daughter follows babywise, and it's the best thing for her and us. She is right on target with all of the physical, mental and emotional milestones that she is targeted for within her age group - and more advanced at some.
I'm afraid that most people don't read the book before they become critical of it. They make assumptions based on what they hear from other critics! Shame on you.
There is not a rigid schedule, this may happen to some people because they are naturally more rigid, this is not what the book bases it's principles on, they have missed the point. There is a FLEXIBLE schedule, which helps the entire family (and babysitters) know what the expect next. How many of you can say that you have babysitters fighting over who 'gets to' babysit your child?
For the critics out there who have not had children, or are of the many parents who wonder why they have demanding children and they don't know where they went wrong - or it's just the childs 'personality to be obnoxious' I assure you; the people you pass in the mall, on the street and everywhere you go with demanding children without a shred of respect for time or for you, are thinking to themselves - 'if only they'd read babywise'. Does that seem like a blanket statement, judging everyone who doesn't follow babywise? Is that not the common thread to this blog, that everyone who uses babywise is a nutter?
I've had friends who have had babies at 5 months and 8 months who haven't yet slept through the night. Within 3 days of receiving babywise and following the simple and flexible scheudle, they are sleeping through the night for the first time. This is not only for the child's benefit, but imagine how much happier the household is when Mum is well rested!
I will go to my grave singing the praises of this fabulous book, without which the world of parenthood would be full of much more irritation and helplessness. I commend Gary Ezzo and Robert Bucknam with the common sense and talent that they have willingly passed on to the millions of parents who have benefitted from thier wisdom.
For those of you considering the book, I encourage you to read it and give it a try. The worst that can happen is that you all get a great nights sleep! Better yet, try to go without following the principles for a while and see how that works out for you, then try babywise! You'll be in for such a treat!
PS I'm a Christian because I'm not perfect, not because I think I am. This book is not for Christians, it's for parents, whatever they believe. Please don't make the mistake.