Older Woman and Younger Men: What Topped Me Over
By TS Dickey on July 15, 2012
Okay, younger men got that six pack thing going on. Not all of them but quite a few. On the contrary - it’s not the power abs that caused me to begin considering the possibility that I might begin dating cougar style – privately anyway.
No, actually is was the fact that I was getting older while staying completely fit without much effort and most of the men of a certain age for whom I still held an affinity were not able to keep up with me.
For example, a few years ago, I wanted to attend an outdoor October sports event in New York - even though it was raining – just a light mist outside. My few years older date ran down a gamut of ‘ailments’ to inform me why he couldn’t attend (even though the tickets I bought were fairly expensive).
“My knee hurts when it rains. I might catch a cold and get sick; I’ll be down a week trying to get better. The game doesn’t end until 1:00 a.m. and I go bed around 10 p.m….. yada, yada, yada.”
I would have lost several hundred dollars (yes they were close to the front row seats) if it had not been for one of my friends’ asking her younger man to contact a friend to see if he wanted to attend the game with me. The only request the friend made was to have a picture of his ‘date’ (me) sent before he made a commitment.
I got a phone call a minute later and he and I had a great time past 1:00 a.m. – the game went into triple overtime. I realized then that my energy level was much more compatible to my younger acquaintance. A few more ‘dates’ later and I learned exactly how much more compatible in all areas the two of us were.
According to an article in JapanToday (KuchikomiJun. 27, 2012), an informal poll conducted among 200 women in their 40s found 90% have dated younger men. Meiji University psychologist Yoshihiko Morotomi’s analysis makes you wonder why this state of affairs took so long to develop, so ideal and natural does he make it seem. “It’s a matter of communication,” he says. “Women and men of around 40 have pride. One partner’s pride clashes with the other. Then there are the so-called herbivorous men in their 20s. They have no haughty poses, they’re considerate down to the smallest details. They know how to make a woman feel valued.”Young men, moreover, who in the not-too-distant past would have spurned women not much younger than their mothers no longer feel that way. “The attitude among men in their 20s,” Morotomi says, citing surveys among students, “is, ‘As long as she’s good-looking, it doesn’t matter how old she is.’”
This newfound knowledge did not cancel out my attraction for men of a certain age but there is no doubt it doubled my options in the dating arena.
I began to notice a fair number of older women/younger men pair ups. Some were obviously for sexual satiation, but quite a few were obviously meaningful. Although I did not want, was not interested in and resisted a permanent relationship with my first younger man, it definitely made me break through the barrier I previously held regarding these types of relationships.
Would I marry a younger man? Yes, because I did; however, I also divorced him. Why? He needed a little more time to grow up – even though a 30 year old woman would definitely consider him a ‘man of a certain age’.
This discrepancy in maturity based mostly on chronological age made me keenly aware that age ain’t nothin’ but a number. A man 40 can be far more juvenile than a man 21; it just depends on his personality, level of responsibility and stage of maturity.
Many reports confirm that older women and younger men are a better sexual match up than older men and younger women. I can vouch for that. Obviously, part of the reason is that most women don’t need artificial stimulants to enjoy amorous encounters with their male (or female) partners.
Although most women like to warm up, usually both partners get to the point around the same time.
Since men have an outward easily identified source of their readiness, faking the funk is not too easy for them. They really have to be turned on in order to act upon their desires. Younger men rarely have a problem when they get the interactive stage, but older men don’t enjoy that youthful vigor.
Speaking of youthful vigor, it translates to freedom in the older woman. As she ages, many of the inhibitions fade away (including motherhood responsibilities) and she is in it to win it – meaning orgasm. Quite a few of them for the first time.
A real turn on for an already turned on younger man.
The chances are – if you are an older woman with a very compatible younger man – you don’t have a problem show casing him to the world. Although there is quite some resistance from older men regarding this pair up – women have gained too much power to allow this double standard to hold much water.
Social norms be damned; it’s not just a man’s world anymore – its cougar time. ____________________
Are you an Older Woman Who Wants to Showcase Her Younger Man? Nominate him for the #1 Cub of All Time and the two of you may win an all expense paid weekend to Miami, Florida in October 2012.
Social Question: Why Are Empty Nest Single Women More Inclined to Lose Their Sexual Inhibitions?
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