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Nordette is a freelance journalist, published fiction writer, poet, and the mother of two children. She is also a BlogHer.com Contributing Editor an...
 
 
 
 

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Omphaloskepsis for the Midlife Writer: Finish Your Novel

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The ghosts of novels past are coming to me nightly, paging me daily. They come as my own voice poking me to finish what I once started, but a few days ago a more unnerving ghost appeared, and her presence was louder and clearer than any self-recrimination. Her name was Elsie B. Washington.

Elsie is credited as the first African-American romance novelist to write and sell a romance novel with a black hero and heroine. Her novel, Entwined Destinies, was published under the name Rosalind Welles by Dell in 1980. She only wrote one. Elsie died in a geriatric home in Manhattan at age 66 last month from cancer and multiple sclerosis.

She would never have known this, but she has followed me around for the last 26 years. While others are writing about her death as author of a first, I remember her as a flesh and blood, attractive black woman with cropped natural hair, a poised and polished writer more than 15 years my senior who I met at a romance writers convention in the early 80s.

I went because of the buzz that publishers like Dell and Harlequin were interested in publishing African-American romance novels. While hers was the first, I don't think either of us grasped the implications of what she'd accomplished. She shared with me concern that her publishers were still a little skittish. Her book, Entwined Destinies, had sold 25,000 copies, and Dell was disappointed, hoping it would have sold more.

"But it seems 25,000 is not bad for the first," she said to me.

I told her that considering most African-American women weren't even aware that anyone had published a "black romance novel," 25,000 copies were good indeed. Her novel may have sold more copies later. I don't know.

As I studied her next to me, I saw a woman who was living the life I'd dreamed I'd live since I was child. She was a writer for Newsweek magazine, which to me made her a black goddess. She'd cracked a ceiling working for a major mainstream magazine, while I had gotten married, left college, had a baby, and put my life on hold.

But I was at this conference hoping I could write a romance novel. God knows I had started more than one, and had read enough of them to possibly write one in my sleep. In addition, I was a member of a romance writers group in Charlottesville, Va., which is how I'd heard about the convention in the first place. I'd also taken a class at U.Va., not for romance novel writing but for non-genre fiction. A woman who'd earned her MFA in the school's prestigious creative writing program taught the course, and I knew you could move on to take classes in the MFA program without a bachelors if you submitted your work and was deemed talented enough.

Hearing that I wanted to enter the program, the teacher told me to go for it, but as far as she was concerned my fiction was already "better" than some of the people graduating from the program, she said. That made me feel good, and I'm not telling you that to brag, but to say that she was one in a line of people to come who would make similar observations about my fiction writing, and yet I never cracked down and dedicated myself to fiction the way I'd always thought I'd do.

Later my family moved from Virginia, northward, and then moved again farther south than Virginia to a place where I finished my degree. One semester was paid by a fiction writing scholarship. I'd decided to apply at the last minute and wrote the winning short story, which was later published, in one night. The man who made the decision to award the scholarship to me said, "I think if you'd keep writing and start submitting your work, you'll be published."

WOW! I thought, and then when I took a literature course through him and realized that he was one of the pickiest English professors I've ever known (he only read books that had managed to stay in bookstores for at least 10 years, I think), I remembered his vote of confidence in my fiction and danced on a cloud a little longer.

And we moved again and the next person to tell me something similar to the professor was a published novelist who

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PinkLockerMom 5 pts

All true. It's hard to start, to keep going in the middle, and to finish. Billie Letts, author of Where the Heart Is, provides a heap of encouragement in this essay about her roundabout journey to writing her first book.

 http://www.knowsouthernhistory.net/Culture/Literat...

PinkLockerMom 5 pts

All true. It's hard to start, to keep going in the middle, and to finish. Billie Letts, author of Where the Heart, provides a heap of encouragement in this essay about her roundabout journey to writing her first book.

 http://www.knowsouthernhistory.net/Culture/Literat...

Dori7 5 pts

Nordette,

I love that you asked me that question :) It is great food for thought and something I've been chewing on more and more. I think that in the past, it was procrastination, and yet, I think that wasn't the whole story when I look back now. There was some fear there of some kind. However, nowadays I'm pushing forward with it more. I'm finding that now I'm working more on what makes me happy. So reacquainting myself with my novel aspirations has been interesting. I'm just slow sometimes :-) Your post though and the responses have shown me that I'm not alone on this path. It helps. I'm going to get there :) I also loved your nod to Elsie B. Washington. I had been reading about her passing recently and reading about what she did inspired me that extra bit on the day that I read it. Then I read your post and I knew that it was a wonderful bit of synchronicity.

Thanks for asking me that question and making me look within a bit and thanks for the connection here :)

Dori

http://fromayellowhouse.blogspot.com ( http://fromayellowhouse.blogspot.com/ )

melissa.t 5 pts

Yes, I will finish that NOVEL... by Christmas 2009?  by New Year's Day 2010? soon!  Thank you for saying what everyone is thinking. 

http://melissatellier.blogspot.com  "My Drivel" - fiction and non-fiction

Nordette Adams 6 pts

CJ, I hope you'll post that challenge in Midlife Sonata ( http://www.blogher.com/groups/midlife-sonata ) group. I like it enough to create a contest and send the winner, after votes, a box from Best of New Orleans. :-)

I think some people have toyed around with "boomer bloom" before, but eventually people other than baby boomers will be in midlife.

Nordette Adams ( http://www.bookotopia.com ) is a BlogHer CE ( http://www.blogher.com/haystackprofile/viewprofile... ) & you can find her other stuff through Her 411 ( http://her411.com ).

halflifecrisis 5 pts

Now we need a clever word for the creative surge of mid-life. I know so many people (women, especially) who are getting around to creating the art they've put on the back burner for too long.

CJ

http://halflifecrisis.com

ByJane 5 pts

 I've been in a mood lately.  Not so much a snit as an "aw crap" mood.  Nothing was working out the way I wanted it to.  Or if it was, it was taking too damn long to show results.  My personal blog, ByJane ( http://byjane.blogspot.com ), has been dying on the vine while I throw all my energy into MidLifeBloggers ( http://midlifebloggers.com ).  While I do cross-post ByJane on MidLifeBloggers, the very personal stuff, the whining and wingeing and sighing and moping, didn't seem like it belonged on MidLifeBloggers.  And really, that very personal stuff is where my mind and heart are these days.  

So I took a chance, opened up ByJane and started to write.  It all just came out, without a hitch or a stutter, so that I could see clearly that what was inside was just waiting for a chance to be said.  And then, because I'm a write, I hit Publish.  And because I'm an Editor, I cross-posted it to MidLifeBloggers.  

I don't know whether it will be read, but that it was written makes all the difference to me.  Suddenly, I can breathe again.  Someone once asked me why I write, and my answer was simple, "Because I can't not write."  I need to remember that and I need to remember that in the process, genre is incidental.

 By Jane

http://midlifebloggers.com 

http://byjane.blogspot.com

ByJane 5 pts

when it's between the matriarchy? 

I love you too, Denise, but you've got TW!

By Jane

http://midlifebloggers.com 

http://byjane.blogspot.com

ana2271 5 pts

Fear and worry do take their toll on me.

I began a blog four years ago, and during the third year, fell in a creative heap. I deleted the 3 and a bit year old blog, because it had nothing creative in it. I realized that blogging isn't creative writing, and creating writing may be added to a blog, but the blogging niche I was writing for, was snarky and not to my liking.

That isn't to say that blogging is negative. I do like writing. I write every day, but now I control more of my time, and refuse to fall into the trap (SEO, traffic obsessions, etc). Blogging should be fun and, for writers, shouldn't overtake other projects.

After shutting down the previous blog, I returned to two novels I had saved on my PC. I've proofread one, and am planning on submitting it to a few literary agents. 

ana2271 5 pts

Fear and worry do take their toll on me.

I began a blog four years ago, and during the third year, fell in a creative heap. I deleted the 3 and a bit year old blog, because it had nothing creative in it. I realized that blogging isn't creative writing, and creating writing may be added to a blog, but the blogging niche I was writing for, was snarky and not to my liking.

That isn't to say that blogging is negative. I do like writing. I write every day, but now I control more of my time, and refuse to fall into the trap (SEO, traffic obsessions, etc). Blogging should be fun and, for writers, shouldn't overtake other projects.

After shutting down the previous blog, I returned to two novels I had saved on my PC. I've proofread one, and am planning on submitting it to a few literary agents. 

FerociousKitty 5 pts

My unfinished novel is on the backburner.  An agent I met at a writers' conference had encouraging things about the early chapters, but on the strength of it, she wanted to know if I had anything non-fiction in the works.  I did--kinda, sorta--and I moved that book (about co-parenting) to the front burner on the agent's advice that non-fiction is an easier sell these days.  I hope that my fiction will ride the successful coattails of my non-fiction.  Fingers crossed!

We reach a point in writing where writing groups and classes and
feedback don't help much because we know what we're doing.  The only
thing left to do is write.

Amen and amen.  Elsie B. Washington's story nudged me on just a little bit further.  Thank you, Nordette!

Co-Parenting 101 ( http://coparenting101.org )

BrownPaper 5 pts

Tell me about it. My outie has morphed into an innie with all that gazing.

And even if I get down to writing the novel, I don't know that I'll actually send it to a real live publisher. I get the sad feeling the MS will probably eke out its existence in a box under the bed. 

Great post; I look forward to the sequel.

Niranjana Iyer

http://niranjana.wordpress.com

Nordette Adams 6 pts

An occasional marriage proposal is a beautiful thing regardless of patriarchal oppression. :-)

Nordette Adams ( http://www.bookotopia.com ) is a BlogHer CE ( http://www.blogher.com/haystackprofile/viewprofile... ) & you can find her other stuff through Her 411 ( http://her411.com ).

Nordette Adams 6 pts

My problem is not fear of what people will say about my work. I've sat with the Simon Cowells of several writng groups and classes.  And I used to post work online as well,  but I took it offline because while imitation may be the sincerest form of flattery, out-and-out theft is a pain in the rear.

We reach a point in writing where writing groups and classes and feedback don't help much because we know what we're doing.  The only thing left to do is write.

The dread that wells in me is the horror I've heard of good writers whose good works take years to get published, sometimes not even hitting bookstores until long after they're dead. Yes, I know. I need to get my mind off the bad stories and focus on the good ones.

I'm glad you finished your novel. Please bottle some of the self-discipline it took to finish and mail it to me. :-) And let us know when you sign your deal.

Nordette Adams ( http://www.bookotopia.com ) is a BlogHer CE ( http://www.blogher.com/haystackprofile/viewprofile... ) & you can find her other stuff through Her 411 ( http://her411.com ).

momtrolfreak 5 pts

I'm more of a "fiction writer who wants to also be a blogger" rather than the other way around, HOWEVER in the shortish time I've been blogging I can totally see the narcotic effect. It's good because it keeps me writing SOMETHING, but yeah, I can see how given the choice one would choose the instant gratification of blogging over the long-haul fiction route. I'll have to redouble my efforts to put some time aside every day to write JUST FICTION. In addition to the blog. And motherhood. And the full time job. And grad school. (Um, help).

thanks for the post! 

Laura

momtrolfreak.com

Nordette Adams 6 pts

And I have at least two that the computer ate, meaning disk failure without back up. Ohhh the pain!

Nordette Adams ( http://www.bookotopia.com ) is a BlogHer CE ( http://www.blogher.com/haystackprofile/viewprofile... ) & you can find her other stuff through Her 411 ( http://her411.com ).

Nordette Adams 6 pts

It's true, blogging will disciplines us to write daily, but we still need to make a conscious effort to write fiction. The instant gratification of hearing from other bloggers in comments can lull us to sleep and we may never go back to fiction if we don't make an effort. :-)

However,  you could finish a nonfiction book. Goodness knows we're hearing more and more about blogs converted to books. And some people have blogs that are all fiction.

Thank you for telling me about your five chapters. Misery of the unfinished novel loves company.

Nordette Adams ( http://www.bookotopia.com ) is a BlogHer CE ( http://www.blogher.com/haystackprofile/viewprofile... ) & you can find her other stuff through Her 411 ( http://her411.com ).

Nordette Adams 6 pts

My novel-in-progress, at least the one I choose to work on, has romantic elements but I don't think I'll ever attempt to write a tradtional romance novel again since I don't read them like I used to. :-) And I know the genre's changed a lot since I did.

Get cracking on finishing yours. I'll read it!

Nordette Adams ( http://www.bookotopia.com ) is a BlogHer CE ( http://www.blogher.com/haystackprofile/viewprofile... ) & you can find her other stuff through Her 411 ( http://her411.com ).

Nordette Adams 6 pts

What do you think is keeping you from moving further?

Nordette Adams ( http://www.bookotopia.com ) is a BlogHer CE ( http://www.blogher.com/haystackprofile/viewprofile... ) & you can find her other stuff through Her 411 ( http://her411.com ).

Denise 9 pts moderator

the user name and there was no other context. I had to come and see who ByJane was proposing to. (I was jealous even if marriage IS a tool of the patriarchy!)

;-)

~Denise
BlogHer Community Manager

Flamingo House Happenings ( http://www.flamingohouse.net/ )

LiaMack 5 pts

But not anymore! I reached a climax in my own 'writing career' where I want to hear what others have to say - good, bad, ugly - about my writing so I can improve...and improve I have!

 I'm editing my first novel and yes, I agree - the fear and self doubt tends to creep back time and time again... but you just have to keep keepin' on. Like you said...if you don't finish...you don't finish!

Good post, and good luck!

www.LiaMack.com ( http://www.LiaMack.com )

www.TheGreenMamas.com ( http://www.TheGreenMamas.com )

ByJane 5 pts

No?  Okay, then can we have a writer's support group, one with a very long cord so that the wine flows from LA to CA?  I have never published a novel.  I have never finished a novel.  But if the almost theres, and false starts and couple of chapters were to be collected (and perhaps annotated!), it would take up several reams at least.

By Jane

http://midlifebloggers.com 

http://byjane.blogspot.com

momtrolfreak 5 pts

I'm with  you. Started a novel and got through five chapters in 2006 and then had a baby and screched to a halt. He's three now. Five chapters still sitting there. They're pretty good, i think, but more? Hasn't happened. That's why I start blogging, actually, to get an audience so I'd have responsbility to write every single day, or someone would be mad at me. Deadlines are golden. If I can get into the habit of daily writing, the novel has to get finished at some point, right? 

Laura

momtrolfreak.com

ddavis0520 5 pts

I, too, have an unfinished romance novel.  You have inspired me to dust it off.  Thanks!

Deborah Davis

TheDomesticallyChallengedCook.blogspot.com

TheWeeklyRetreat.blogspot.com

Dori7 5 pts

I can relate. I have been continually "wanting to finish writing my novel" for years. I look forward to the next part of this post :)

http://fromayellowhouse.blogspot.com ( http://fromayellowhouse.blogspot.com/ )