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Defining Motherhood
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I am a writer, a reader, a black coffee drinker; a runner, a golfer and a lover of nature; a wife, a mother and a wanna be world changer.
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Open-Minded Labor

March 03, 2011 7:08 am by DefiningMotherhood in Family
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I had a conversation with Amber O’Brien, a certified birth doula in South Bend, Ind., a few weeks ago. She told me about the birth of her son and how that has shaped her perspective and advice to others. She hoped for a natural birth. When labor hit, it progressed much more rapidly than she had expected. There came a moment in the delivery room that she second-guessed herself. “I asked for the epidural. If I would’ve had someone there who would’ve said I didn’t need it, I would’ve avoided it.” She went on to say, “I view my birth experience on two different spectrums: I was happy it was quick, but then again, I didn’t get the natural birth I wanted. I could kick myself for having the epidural.”

So her advice to moms-to-be? “My advice is that you don’t want to expect too much or be too completely dead set on plans for labor. Everything could change in an instant. If the baby’s not happy, no one is. Be open-minded going into it.”

What about you? Were you open minded? Or did you go in with a specific plan in mind with the conviction to not waiver…whether that be for natural birth or an epidural from the get go? Or did you take more of a laissez-fair approach?

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Mrs_wonderbread
Mrs_wonderbread 5 pts

I was and wasn't.
I had hoped to wait on the epidural until I was more like, 7 cm dialated, got it at three because of terrible back labor.
Got a cesarean when it was the last thing I wanted.
I've told my friends make a plan for what you want, but also look into what else could be done, because it might... my friend due in a few weeks awnts a med-free birth but has also gotten herself informed on cesareans and epidurals (she's a studier.)
Float like a butterfly, sting like a bee- Muhammed Ali

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DefiningMotherhood
DefiningMotherhood 5 pts

What a story! That must've been frightening for you, but thankfully all were healthy in the end! I guess it shows that you never know what birth and labor are going to throw at you.

I hope you'll take the time to visit our site www.Unexpectant.com ( http://www.Unexpectant.com ). We're gathering real women's stories, advice, triumphs and trials to create a resource for moms-to-be (and a point of catharsis for moms-already).

Thanks for your comment!

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melindarp
melindarp 5 pts

I had my ideal mapped out in my head: Go into labor, get an epidural (not a natural kind of girl), NO episiotomy, and give birth. I was just hoping not to have a cesarean. But I was ready to be flexible if I needed to be.

I was grateful the epidural was in place when I ended up in the OR.

My baby had a cord issue. I was only dilated to a 4 (after 12 hours) when my baby's monitors started to flat-line -- belly and scalp. Every time baby slipped down toward the birth canal, his cord got compressed and the monitor flat-lined until our nurse pushed him back up and held him there. After two progressively more dramatic hours of that, and still at a 4, all I wanted was a c-section.

In the end I had no regrets. I had a healthy baby.

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