Pat Robertson on Alzheimer's and Marriage Vows

Really?? People for the American way and this is what they give us? IT IS ALL ABOUT ME!! no wonder we are going to he** in a handbasket...just two words for Pat and his right wing Christian buddies who sponsored this...Nancy Reagan...

I took care of my mother when she had Alzheimer's. Walking away from her - or anyone in that state - is akin to walking away from a young child. Would you abandon your sick & dying child simply because she was no long able to recognize you due to the ravages of disease?

Love, generosity, compassion - these aren't about recognition. And being bound by your word, through sacred vows - that's not about the binding, it's about integrity, honor, devotion - not only to the other, but to yourself, to the choice you made with free will, full mind & heart.

I could never judge or presume to know how it feels, how THAT particular person feels. Either you can do it or not.
I'd rather someone walk away and leave the afflicted person in someone else capable hands than to resent & abuse them. Or go crazy one day & kill them both.

I just cannot and will not judge another, no matter how cowardly or heartless the act seems.

@ Pamela and Janece - yes, the person with Alzheimer's is going to deteriorate and then die. And yes, SOMETIMES that means they won't recognize their spouse at the end. (I know some people who say the ONE person that gma or gpa still recognized was the spouse.) And YES, the caregiver NEEDS and DESERVES respite. But going out to get some relief while someone else takes care of the sick person is a WHOLE other ball game than actually abandoning them. And that's what divorce DOES - it lets them ABANDON their spouse.
THAT is WRONG. If the caregiving spouse should actually meet someone before the dying spouse dies, then the new person should be a decent enough human being to let it be simple friendship until AFTER the dying spouse dies. If you can't wait 10 years for him/her, how in love ARE you, really? And if it's just about the sex, why bother with the divorce?

I have finally realized you have to stand in someone else's shoes to know how you would deal with a particular situation. Have not stood in those shoes yet--pray I would rise to the occasion.

Nope.

Many of the downs that occur in a typical marriage could be defined as a sort of " death". Financial struggles can cause death of spirit; medications and illness can cause death of sexuality; etc. There are no easy outs when you vow to stay with someone through sickness. How meaningful would vows be that can be considered invalid when things get hard? If you think about it standard marriage vows are asking nothing more than "will you put aside selfishness for the needs of this other person?"

So very bad! He and Newt should start a couples therapy group...

AS a person who has a parent with Alzheiners and see what is coming. when my Mom is no longer "here" and zoned out 24/7 I might feel okay if my dad goes out, you have NO idea what strain he is under 24/7 with taking care of my mom. I was initially Angry with PR, but in context his comment is not so harsh, not really.

Let's say that someone else besides Pat Robertson said this. Let's say that a spouse is in the final stages of this dreadful disease, no longer recognizes their mate, and there's (obviously) no hope for a cure. Let's say that the care-giving spouse has hung in there for years and years through their spouses deteriorating process - which is HELL on earth. Yet the care giver is still healthy and full of life.

I think I would show COMPASSION to the mate contemplating divorce if - in the process - they were still providing for the physical care of the person who no longer recognized them. I wouldn't be so quick to pass judgement on them, if they - after years of dealing with this kind of pain and - in a very real sense DEATH (even before the one with the disease actually dies).

If the tables were turned, and I was the spouse with the disease, I would want my husband to go on with his life. I know he would take care of my physical needs (paying for me to be in hospice care of whatever). Why SHOULDN'T he be loved and get the support HE needed, after the one he loves - ME - no longer recognized him or had any memories of him???

Well, sadly, there is nobody on earth who is not a hypocrite in some way. None of us will be perfect this side of heaven. Now, if we follow Pat's way of thinking, then we are on a very slippery slope. If Alzheimers is a type of death, then what about everything else? Cancer? Paralysis (oh, wait, the courts already decided we can deny food to a person paralyzed and mentally not 100% until they die...)? Following the Word of God is not always easy. I've seen 4 people in my family struggle with Alzheimers disease. It's really hard. Cancer is hard. Strokes are hard. There's no easy way out.

Sorry, Pat, can't agree with you. For those who have been placed in a role of teaching and authority in the church, God has set a higher standard. Keep that in mind when creating your own version of scriptures.

No! He clearly does not read the Bible or is a true follower of Christ. If he WASNT a hypocrite, he would know that Christ himself said the only reason for divorce is adultery. Read the bible you claim to follow, Pat. This infuriates me!!!

I can't believe someone would be so selfish to encourage that. My father died one year ago from alzheimers and my mother struggled through every minute of it. He was 65 when he died, and two days short of their 43rd wedding anniversary. The harsh reality is, the person with alzheimers is going to die. Why not wait for that to move on?

No! And if he actually read the book he purports to represent he would not have said such a douche bag thing. He is an embarrassment to humanity.

No! Marriage is a vow taken in sickness and health til death do us part before GOD or whatever spiritual beliefs. This guy is a clear example of hypocritical ignorance that exemplifies organized religion to be a man made set of rules.

Does anyone agree with Pat Robertson about anything?