A Personal Best

This past weekend I attended my monthly book and everyone is pontificating her theories and I found myself jumping into the lion’s den of opinion.  Have you ever found yourself talking and not clearly making your point and before you can find yourself someone has already shot you down into oblivion?  If you know what I mean then you know that you pretty much feel like a chastised puppy who slithers away with it’s tail between it’s legs. But despite this social blunder, therein lies a personal best for me. 

Usually these missteps cause me to doubt my entire existence. Questions of “why am I on the earth? Am I no good? I can’t even defend my own opinion. How am I qualified to be a mother? Everyone thinks I am dumb.  I’m sure my husband is just putting up with me.” 

But this time, NO WAY! I was able to isolate the incident to that moment and that moment only. There are so many factors that go into a moment such as that… ego’s, insecurities, verbal boastings, and pride that it is unrealistic for either pontificate to walk away with an objective point of view. But the most significant victory is my ability to maintain my confidence as a woman as wife and as a mother. That was an isolated incident.  And one thing is for sure, I will be presented with another opportunity where maybe I will be a more skilled in my verbal hurdling and have a chance to redeem myself.  

The nugget here is that life happens, we don’t always hit the mark and those around you will not always pad the fall. It is our job to have thick skin, be a big girl and say… “That didn’t go as I planned but that is ok. I will have another chance to do better.” The victory is in not letting these minor blunders seep into your soul to discourage you because then you truly have failed. I know I will have more opportunity to overcome this negative self-talk but for now I am going to CELEBRATE this personal best! 

AfroTina

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