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I had quite a week... Four days ago, computer tragedy happened. You’ll instantly think to yourself, “you had everything backed up, right?” Well, I can say yes and NO! I have had a external hard drive all along, but only recently has it become too small. Therefore, back up errors kept flashing at me. So I made arrangements to sell my current one so I could buy a larger one. I cleaned it and was ready to hand it over to the new owner, that night I had a catastrophic hard drive crash, THAT NIGHT, what are the chances?. COMPLETELY FRIED! The computer is still under warranty so I took it right in for repair and any retrieval they might be able to do. NO BACK UP and a fried hard drive is a writer’s & business owners worst nightmare. I threw a really big internal tantrum, asking WHY? The timing is unbelievable, I mean really... how often could that possibly happen to ANYONE! Well... according to the Mac experts, NEVER! They have never seen this happen since opening 10 years ago, EVER! After my tantrum, I resigned to the inevitable and let it go. I prayed that maybe just my photos could be saved, that I could start over with everything else. As it turns out my user file was the only thing left, therefore my personal files were transferrable and safe. Thankfulness washed over me. 12 years worth of photographs were okay and the website was still intact.
I could not spend any time on the computer when I got home with it today, so until this very moment I have been wonderfully optimistic and ready to load all the programs that were wiped out. But, as I sit here the reality has slowly sunk in, my desktop is GONE. Every folder that I have kept here for easy access is gone, no big deal, right? Oh how I wish that were true! Basically everything that I use everyday was on the desktop, I’m sure someone is thinking, “oh, you should never put important things on your desktop!” Well I did! So this is what I am lamenting;
My entire Shop Wise Bags folder, which is every sold invoice, every template I have created, all of my branding, logos, buttons, forms, customers, contacts, contracts and on and on...
Every story my kids have written, including all Homeschool stuff.
Every article I have written in the last five years.
Every assignment from my 4 year writing course.
All my scanned artwork, patterns, garden info, garden catalogs & lists.
All the baby book templates that my mom has developed for her custom children’s keepsake books.
The new Taekwondo curriculum that I wrote, all our tools, & posters that took four months to develop and write.
Two How-To books that I just completed.
Every button and correspondence I have collected from 7 months of blogging.
many ebooks and courses that I have bought over the years.
As depressing as this list is, it goes on! I need perspective. I am feeling very upset but so thankful for what has been saved. I’m trying so hard to be grateful and not dwell on this tragic event. My most prevailing thought is: Why? Our other computer (the poor PC we call “the throw away”) crashed with 23 viruses only three days before this event. So, I am considering this colliding similarity. Should I keep blogging, is our business worth the hours we put into it, am I doing what I am supposed to be doing? We have so many blessings, this really is not earth shattering but writing has been a huge part of my life and in less than a second and the error of feeling safe without my usual diligent backups, it’s all GONE! Am I avoiding “the lightning bolt?” HMMM... I wonder...
I’ve had my pity party. I have taken responsibility for my actions and I have done my best to move on...
So, I am welcoming the clean slates in my life. Not easily but willingly.
The last few days have been spent really assessing my life. I have swung wildly between throwing in the towel completely and pushing myself to the ends of all reasonable levels of perseverance.
What I hope to land on is a balance of working on purposeful endeavors like writing, artwork & fitness training mixed into the dailyness of my life of kids, homeschooling and domestic
