Single
Pets? No, Thanks.
by Zandria

Some of my friends have animals, and they love them. They post pictures of their dogs and cats on their blogs, and on Facebook, and Twitter. And, you know, I think that's great. I certainly don't dislike animals. It's just that I have no desire to own one myself.

I'm perfectly fine with busting the myth of the single cat lady. (I'm not going to call it "crazy cat lady," because, you know, whatever. The majority of single female cat-owners I know are perfectly rational and lovely.)

I've dated men who had dogs, so if a guy has a pet it isn't an automatic disqualifier -- I mean, he's the one who would have to take care of it. For my part, I'm more than happy to rub your pet's head (as long as I can wash my hands afterward), and coo about how cute it is, and maybe even put some thought into how very social it can be to have a dog. (I mean, how easy is it to strike up a conversation with someone when they're walking around with a dog? I see it happen all the time.)

I like animals, I just don't love animals. If I loved an animal, I guess I wouldn't mind having to deal with a cat's litter box, or getting up early in the morning (or in the snow, or rain) to take a dog outside, or vacuuming up their fur.

It's not like I've never had a pet. I know how it is to live with one -- in fact, there have been pets in almost all of the locations I've lived in since I was a kid. We had a variety of animals when I was growing up. A dog, or a cat, or both. There were also hamsters, and a bird.

However, I haven't lived with a pet for over three years, since I moved to northern Virginia in October 2006. I lived by myself first, and for the past two years I've had a roommate. My roommate is actually a huge animal lover, and I'm sure she'd have a cat if she could -- but she happens to be extremely allergic to anything with fur. Although I'm sorry that someone who loves animals as much as she does can't have one, I have to admit I'm glad that I don't to worry about her bringing an animal home.

I've mentioned that I'm thinking about finding a new place to live, and if I decide to get a new roommate instead of living by myself, yes, I would use the presence of a pet as a roommate-disqualifier. I don't mind pets in somebody else's house, but given a choice I'd rather not have one in my house.

Additional downsides to having a pet that I've noticed and internalized: Vet bills - I'm always hearing about someone who had to spend hundreds (or even thousands) of dollars on a sick pet. General maintenance - lugging around big bags of dog food or cat litter. Inconvenience - having to come home to take a dog outside when you'd rather do something else (or having to pay someone to come in and take them for a walk in the middle of the day). Having to plan around them - dealing with boarding them when you go on vacation, or having to get someone else to watch them.

I've found there are certain things that are nice to have sometimes, but they're more trouble than they're worth the other times. This is how I feel about pets. While it might seem like a pleasant distraction to have a cat curled by my side, or for a dog to look at me with that quizzical, head-tipped gaze, the fact is I know myself, and I know that I would be annoyed and possibly resentful most of the time if I were the sole caretaker for an animal.

Does anybody else feel this way?

Related Reading:

Dolittler is a veterinarian and doesn't understand people who don't like pets. She compiled a list of some of the issues "that hold people back when it comes to animal-keeping," but none of the issues she lists are reasons that I've given. For instance, I don't think pets are dirty

...

“Pets are dirty and spread disease”: This POV is common but does not apply to the kind of pet keeping you and I are familiar with. Still, if someone was raised by a filthy aunt who kept cats in deplorable conditions you can understand why they might forever be traumatized by the concept of cat pee. Furthermore, it’s this sentiment that keeps pets out of doors among many who hold it dear.

JanaARIES said that she didn't grow up with many pets and didn't used to like them...but then she got her terrier.

When I brought that little fur ball home and into my life, she did what pets do. She wrapped me so many times around her paw in about 5 seconds and showed me just how much love you can get from a pet and how much love and respect they deserve.

FibraArtysta posted "an open letter to pets" on her blog (she didn't write but, but found it funny). An excerpt:

If you don't want their hair on your clothes, stay off the furniture. That's why they call it 'fur'-niture.

(Contributing editor Zandria blogs at Zandria.us.)

Submitted by Zandria (view blog) on Sun, 10/04/2009 - 4:26pm
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Comments

 

I completely agree

I would rather not have a pet!  We do have a dog and we have learned to respect each other , but she is not one of my favorite living things! LOL!  I don't like to walk her, water her or feed her.  Luckily my hubby and son take care of that.  I didn't want her and I made it clear that I would not be the one doing the work!  We've had her 11 years and I've only had to do it on a few rare occasions.  So while I will accept having a pet in the home, I won't take the responsibility!! 

But if I HAD to have a pet, I would choose fish for many apparent reasons!!

Margaret Rogers

Dress My Doll - http://njemilyroseathome.blogspot.com/

Submitted by maggie965 on Sun, 10/04/2009 - 16:50
 

At least your husband and

At least your husband and son actually do all/most of the maintenance! I've heard of other people who didn't want the pets and still had to end up doing a lot of the day-to-day work. :)

Personal blog: Zandria.us BlogHer blog: Singles/Fitness

Submitted by Zandria on Mon, 10/05/2009 - 18:12
 

You have pretty much described my position

My friends have birds in big cages, and any kind of late afternoon/early evening plans are hosed because of the birds' schedule.  And the schedule fluctuates throughout the year depending upon what time the sun is coming up and going down.  And it's not just feeding and going - no, the cages have to be cleaned daily, and the birds have to be played with.  And they are loud.  And there are feathers all over the place, which I admit they try to keep up with so there's another thing to add to my "and and and" list - critters shed!

So, um, yeah - no thanks!  In my own life, the sticking point is definitely being tied to the responsibility of maintenance and not being able to just go and run and do.  If I wanted impingement on my freedom to go and run and do, I'd have kids!

Erin

My Mobile Adventures *~*~* - Mobile/photo blog | @BellTinkR

The Single Rider - The fine line between "alone" and "free" | @TheSingleRider

Submitted by Erin White on Mon, 10/05/2009 - 03:54
 

Heck no!

Oh, my gosh, there's no way I'd want to go home to take care of BIRDS! These must be something special; usually birds are more self-sufficient than that. I mean, cleaning the cage every day? A friend of mine used to have a few parrots in a huge cage, and it was a lot like that.

Personal blog: Zandria.us BlogHer blog: Singles/Fitness

Submitted by Zandria on Mon, 10/05/2009 - 18:14
 

I don't share your opinion,

I don't share your opinion, but I can certainly respect it, because it's pretty much the same as how I feel about having kids.  I don't hate kids and I completely understand why people have them, but for me personally, it seems like a huge, life-changing responsibility that I'd rather not take on.  Pets may be a lot of work and hassle at times, but for me, they're just the right balance between effort and reward.  I know there's a lot of reward to be had from raising kids, but my personal opinion is that they're far more work than having a pet.

Sara

www.inkandpixelclub.com

Submitted by InkAndPixelClub on Mon, 10/05/2009 - 04:48
 

Pets are a lot of work

And if I'm going to put all that effort into another living thing, I'd rather it be a kid.

(My blogs are http://flightkeeper.blogspot.com and http://cutefuncool.blogspot.com)

Submitted by Flightkeeper on Mon, 10/05/2009 - 04:54
 

I love pets but ...

I love pets and to me the commitment is totally worth it - and I say this as someone who recently spent a small fortune on medical care for my elderly cat.

BUT, I'm a sucker for critters, and I understand the time and dollar commitment involved. Several times I have brought home abandoned pregnant cats - someone didn't have their cat spayed, then dumped her to fend for herself when the inevitable occurred. My own dog is an escape artist (we call him "the wanderer") - twice with previous owners he has ended up as a stray in an animal shelter. His teeth are in appalling shape - the vet thinks he spent an extended amount of time chewing on a rock or a chain.

My point is,  getting a pet without understanding the commitment often results in a very sad outcome for the animal involved.

So for those who don't want pets I say: bravo for realizing this is not a commitment you choose to make. It doesn't matter why. It is a responsible decision, and much better than saying "yes" to pet ownership without thinking through the consequences.

My Project: 50 Books by 50 authors in one year! http://desperadopenguin.blogspot.com/

Submitted by DesperadoPenguin on Mon, 10/05/2009 - 08:02
 

better now than later

I am all for self-awareness on this issue for sure! Too many people have romantic notions about having a pet, and then the pet suffers when reality sinks in. If you don't like pets, that's fine with me --I just wish everyone who didn't like them, didn't have them.

I have a rescue dog who was treated very badly by people who got her because she was "cute" -- they crated her 12 hrs a day without letting her go out.  They muzzled her for even longer periods so she wouldn't bark and disturb them. If she did bark she would be beaten. When I got her she was ragged and wary, scared to have her head touched, cringing and running if she saw me raise my arm quickly for any reason. A year later she has rebounded beautifully, and is a happy and loving creature -- but she is now with someone who does love pets and is willing to commit the time and energy it takes. She will never see a crate or muzzle again.

Not only is it better for you that you know what kind of pet-person you are or are not, it is better for the pet.

 

~~ Contributing Editor, Mata H. also blogs right along at Time's Fool

Submitted by Mata H on Mon, 10/05/2009 - 08:25
 

Pets really are a lot of

Pets really are a lot of work, but they're totally worth it to me. They keep me from feeling lonely and give me lots and lots of comfort. My husband is more like you. He likes our pets, but we only have them because I love them and can't imagine living without pets. He's great about pitching in to help when I need it, though.

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Submitted by dianaelee on Mon, 10/05/2009 - 20:13
 

It is a love/hate thing

We have dogs, cats and horses and no matter how much work they are or how frustrated I get with them, I still love them all in the end.

Plus, I convince myself that they are all a food source if times get REALLY bad.

:)

~ Chelle B.

Submitted by offendedblogger on Tue, 10/06/2009 - 00:39
 

30 animals and counting...

The blogger above that mentioned children. I'm going to have to agree on that too. They seem to be so much work. Animals not so much. Or it's work that i enjoy. I have over 30 animals in my care. Some dumped by people who unlike you don't have a good sense about what it takes to care for them. Or is resolute in not wanting them. I have more respect for this then someone that dumps their animal because NOW they realize "fluffy" needs more time then they can give. which is funny in some way as i notice animals don't have to be high maintenance. Let them work for you. Rather then you work for them. They can fit into your home easily if one just puts out that effort early on. (parrots though very high maintenance animals)....

Some I have for hobby. Some i have for a purpose (milk- food). Some for guardian. Some for sheer companionship. Some just because no one else wants them. All of them to me are an absolute joy. Everyday!

But, i don't get out much! And it would be nice to have ONE room that is animal free where i can sit down and not see pet hair. This house is not for those who don't like animals. I've had friends come over and not sit down. :)


But Zandria, how 'bout a gold fish? Something that helps you relax in the evenings. Just a 20 minute communing even with a goldfish is good for the soul... a little bit of food, and minimal care, can reap large rewards in the long run for stress release, too.

 

jojo

www.goodnessgraciousacres.com

twitter: goodnesgracious

Submitted by jojom on Sun, 10/18/2009 - 19:25
 

A goldfish?

I'm not sure about that.  It would certainly be easy to care for, but I don't see myself getting a particular enjoyment about watching Mr. Goldfish swim around.  More power to fish lovers, though!  :)

Personal blog: Zandria.us BlogHer blog: Singles/Fitness

Submitted by Zandria on Fri, 10/30/2009 - 03:34