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I was born in southern California and lived there until midway through my childhood, when I moved to northern California, where lived until college. I bounced between both halves of the state for years. I have lived in cities across the mid-west and east coast. After all that, northern California feels the most like home.
Perhaps it is because I spent more of my formative kid years here. Perhaps it is because I made friends who are still in my life. Probably it is because I have fond memories of lots of time spent with my extended family. Also, the incredible diversity of people and variety of approaches to living is a wonderful treasure that I haven't quite experienced in most other places in the country.
That does not mean that the other cities where I have lived don't have a hold on my heart as well. Southern California is where I lived on my own for the first time. Where I grew into my independence and adulthood. In the mid-west and east coast, I had to work to make those places home, even if it was to be temporary. Snow, regional accents, and different paces of life than I was used to in California all took some adjustments. But adjust I did, and there are things about, and people in each of those places, I came to love and now miss.
The Bay Area is not always a perfect home. The sheer size means that local friends can be 50 miles away. Plus, frankly, it is ridiculously expensive to live here and, as you might have heard, our state government and economy are kind of broken. It is not unusual for people to contemplate moving out of the state for precisely these reasons.
Despite my love for this area, and the fact that I've been back for more than half a decade, made new friends and re-connected with old ones and family, I am not tethered here. I could move. And I wonder if I might.
A long-lost friend of mine recently popped up after having switched coasts from west to east. As she told me about her new home, I thought about whether I could do the same thing. She is not committed to her new city. She reserves the right to wander about some more. And, she still harbors a long-held dream of perhaps living outside the United States.
Another friend is pretty committed to living outside the United States. The pull of far away places has always been strong for her. In graduate school, while I studied American politics, she studied comparative and looked instead at politics and policy in Latin America and Southeast Asia. She met her Afghan husband in Indonesia, and they married in Thailand. My friend is very close to her family here in the U.S., and I still cannot wrap my mind around how she can so happily live on the other side of the earth, rarely seeing them.
The cliche goes that home is where the heart is. Determining where our hearts live is a strange and unique process. I know that for me, I haven't yet found any place that my heart has missed as much as this crazy state. My heart will always live here.
Where is home for you? How did it become home? What do you love about this place?
Related Reading:
Candice at Candice Does The World: How Do You Define Home?
But what is home? Is it your current location? Is it where you grew up? I’m always trying to find my place, as it seems many people are. I feel like St. John’s is my home now, it’s where my things are. My career, my friends, my dresser piled with cosmetics and perfumes. I don’t have the same sort of intimacy with this town.
I don’t recognize a lot of the faces, and they don’t recognize me. Yesterday, I picked up some beer at the store and a handful of people stood chatting at the cash, their eyes following me to the cooler. We smiled and talked, and then the elderly couple asked me my name. They were my neighbours for 10 years.
Ron Judd at The Seattle Times: Figure skater Ashley Wagner considers Kitsap Peninsula home
When Ashley Wagner closes her eyes, breathes deeply and drifts away to her calm place, she winds up in a spot familiar to a lot of us: Hood Canal. Clear waves lapping gently at the beach. Douglas firs soaring
