Positive Vibrator Use: Don't Make It Weird

via MTV's The Girl Code

 

Once when I was in college, my roommate had a friend over who was something of a busybody. As this girl walked past my bookshelf to use the bathroom, she opened up a box I had on my shelf completely unprompted and slammed it shut immediately with a horrified look on her face.

“If you wanted to see my vibrator,” I said, “you could’ve just asked.” Let’s be honest: I was more annoyed that she’d thought it was okay to peek through my stuff when I didn’t even know her than I was ashamed of what I’d known she’d seen.

“I didn’t see your vibrator!” she said, turning bright red. She was guilty, and by a fairly well-hung jury, wink wink.

“You know I know what’s in that box, right?” I laughed, trying to stay calm. Again: it’s not cool to peep through other peoples’ stuff. Especially their sex toys. If you do, you deserve the embarrassment. “Don’t make this weird! It’s not like I didn’t clean it!” She panicked and made some excuse to my roommate about having to leave. Thankfully, roomie also thought her random peeping was uncool and didn’t invite her back.

If you look at that incident, you’d think I probably don’t have any shame. And you’re right, for now. I’m sex positive and being sex positive means embracing certain things boldly. But what you don’t know is that when I first bought that very same vibrator, I bought a birthday card and wrapping paper so the clerk would think I was giving it as a gag gift to a friend. Yep.

We live in the golden age of robo-dicks, so we barely even have to get our dainty, feminine hands dirty anymore. But I can’t tell you how many times I have been talking to women college-aged and older who claim to have never gone to party city in their fun box.

A 2009 study from Indiana University found that women who use vibrators are more satisfied with their sex lives. I mean, makes sense, right? The better we know ourselves, the better we can show our partners how to get to know us. And what’s even more, a separate study revealed that women who take a positive attitude towards their torrid use of mechanical peen have even better sex.

Thankfully, it seems that perception of female sexuality are changing. Whereas previous generations of men sometimes felt intimidated or offended if their lady kept a vibrator around, almost 80% now say that they feel like it’s an important part of a woman’s sexuality. What’s most surprising about that statistic? Only 75% of women feel the same.

Masturbation can have some surprising and awesome benefits for women. Apart from helping you to learn about your body, here are some great reasons why you should make flicking the bean a part of your daily (or at least weekly) habit:

It can improve your mental well-being.

When you have an orgasm, your body releases endorphins, oxytocin, and dopamine. These three chemicals are awesome. Why? Endorphins and oxytocin fight pain and stress, and dopamine is associated with the feeling of pleasure. During sex with another person (or more than one person), those chemicals can have even greater effects such as facilitating bonding, but even during masturbation, they help you fight pain, relieve stress, and amp up your positivity.

It can improve your health.

During orgasm, the cervix contracts and can release built up fluids. This keeps away infections, like UTIs. These contractions can also help you work through cramps, so masturbating while on your period might be messy, but it feels great.

It improves your sexual well-being and your relationships.

 Like above, the better you know yourself, the better you can teach others to know you. Masturbation (and other forms of sex) also releases oxytocin, which is a chemical vital to bonding. So even masturbating with your partner can make you closer, especially if they take over the reigns for a little bit.

I mean, it’s not like I want random people to see my vibrator. But masturbation is a healthy part of human sexuality, and viewing it with positivity makes it even healthier.

[Sources: blisstree.com]

Recent Posts by spicygear

Comments

In order to comment on BlogHer.com, you'll need to be logged in. You'll be given the option to log in or create an account when you publish your comment. If you do not log in or create an account, your comment will not be displayed.