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I have a confession: I used to hate condoms. Of course, I thought, sex felt better skin on skin. How could it not? I didn't have casual sex, and for years, any given boyfriend and I would simply wait the (then) 3 sex-free months, have an HIV test and then not use them. Ah, my birth control pill years.
Nowadays, I'd wait 6 months before I was trusting that HIV test, and even then, I'm figuring it's going to take marriage for that condom to come off. Burned once, shame on evil cheater guy; Burned twice - Yeah, no. I have been a condom convert ever since spending months waiting for that final HIV test that said evil may have touched my heart, but it left my body unscathed.
So I was dismayed to read on Jezebel that one of the 5 Things Every Female Virgin Should Know (And No One Will Tell Her) is: 1.) It Feels Better Without a Condom.
You know, people really get on their high horse when it comes to using condoms. Here's the thing: You know those PSAs or HBO Families in Crisis movies about the importance of safe sex? And there's always a guy who's like slimy and tries to sweet-talk his girlfriend into having sex without a condom because "it feels better." Well, he's right. It totally does feel better. I know, know! Condoms are important for many reasons and you should wear them. But for me, it feels way more natural without one and I'm much less likely to get a UTI.
Yeah, well, here's the thing: I never thought I'd say this, but that's a bunch of BS. Maybe condoms are just better twenty years after I started having sex. I guess certainly they're thinner. I remember them being much harder to use, obvious they were there, irritating (although I'm not prone to UTIs), and oh, that trampoline feeling - Not good. But speaking from the female side of the equation, I can honestly say that while the application of a condom does require a slight pause in the action, nowadays, the presence of one detracts from my sexual experience not one bit.
And can we talk for one second about who has to get up and go to the bathroom after sex? Without condom, that would be me. With condom, I get to lay blissfully under the covers, nice and warm and happy. Seriously, even in a relationship where condoms have been left behind long ago, I'm thinking a box in the nightstand would be nice for those nights you're not too tired for sex, so long as you don't have to drag yourself to the bathroom after. Sometimes, you just want to roll over and pass out, am I right?
Were I to give a piece of condom advice to that female virgin, beyond "Use them and be safe; they feel just fine," it would be that some men really do need larger sized condoms. I don't care if someone rolled an average one up to their elbow in health class, that doesn't mean it's actually comfortable for a well-endowed man. If your partner is large, that may be why he's complaining about condoms. Don't put the condoms away, just whip out the Magnums!
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Related Reading:
Preventing Teenage Pregnancy: My Condom Story - Becoming "The Condom Girl" - Love that! My friends and I always had condoms in our purses in Undergrad in case anyone needed one.
The Condom Story - Hysterical tale of mistaken identity.
Thanking Eve - What condoms and Genesis have in common.
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Contributing editor Liz Rizzo also blogs at Everyday Goddess.
