A Question of Loyalties

Ok, I have a dilemma that i've been discussing.  So let's say you and your friend are single.  You go to the same gym and a fine piece of fineness also starts attending your gym.  So, you see him at the same time and your girlfriend says "damn he's fine."  You think that he looks good too, so you guys spend the next few minutes talking about him.  Now, your friend is crushing on him hard, but never approaches him.  Again, you agree with her, and you never say anything to him either.  And then one day, it happens.  He approaches you and asks you out.

What do you do?  Who gets dibs?  I've found myself in this situation a few times.  If I don't constantly talk about him, I almost feel like i'd be doing my friend dirty if I go out with him.  I know that it would hurt my friends feelings, but I know that it shouldn't because it's not like they ever went out with him or had any intimate conversations with him anything.  Where is the line drawn?  I know that some of my friends are more sensitive than others, but should I let this dude go because of a crush?

In a second scenario, there's this guy in my office that constantly flirts with me.  I let him know that it's not happening because 1) he's married (although separated) and 2) he's waaay too old for me.  I mean, I think he has a kid closer to my age.  So we've been cool.  We don't talk on the phone.  We exchange how ya doin's and how was your weekend conversations.  Today, I was standing and speaking to him.  One of my friends in the office walked by.  He asked me to hook him up.  I told him that she doesn't do the married man thing (secretly I knew that she just wouldn't be attracted mainly because of his age).  But, I passed along the information.  The first thing that she said was, "didn't he like you?"  I said "yeah, but that wasn't for real, for real.  Nothing ever happened.  He was just talking." 

Now there are some cuties in our building that she likes, but hasn't spoken too.  I think that they are cute, but I don't think that i'm stuntin them half as much as she is.  If one of them approaches me and asks me out, am I expected to turn him away?  Generally, I don't play in my friends sandboxes.  I don't mess with any men that they have dated, slept with, or kissed.  Even if it was 100 years ago.  I just don't get down like that.  But what's your opinion on crushes?  Where do you draw the line?


In order to comment on BlogHer.com, you'll need to be logged in. You'll be given the option to log in or create an account when you publish your comment. If you do not log in or create an account, your comment will not be displayed.