Guys, this one's for you – yes, I know I'm posting it on a women's blogging site, but that's because, ladies, you should feel free to pass it on to any guy you know in your life who's on a path toward thinking holistically about love, relationships and family.
In my work over the past two-plus decades, I've focused on relationships of many different types – dating, casual, serious, engagement, marriage, divorce, post-divorce … and in my most recent book, “Hindsight: What you need to know before you drop your drawers” I present the relationship toolbelt. Although applicable for just about anyone, the book – and my subsequent teaching on it – is primarily geared toward women.
But I'm also interested in how the male mind relates to relationships, and I there are many, many guys out there who are on paths toward healthy, honest, fulfilling relationships – dating, marriage or otherwise. How we approach relationship and sex cannot be separated from our values about children, marriage and family (considering one primary unconscious drive is to procreate). Having stated the obvious, it’s what isn’t so obvious that I would like to help illuminate with my next book, Investing Your Family Jewels. It’s an attempt to help folks heal and educate themselves so we as a culture are better equipped to raise healthy, thriving children, rather than continue the cycle of dysfunction we each in our own way struggle to be free of.
Okay, men, it’s your turn to tell your version, your truth - in your life and in your relationships. And here are a few questions to help you get started (if you're so inclined, feel free to email your answers – or your story, or both! - to info at maryannelive dot com. We read and respond personally to each email and I may feature you in upcoming work!)
1)Do you respect women?
2)How do you respect them?
3)At the end of the day, do you feel it’s ultimately a woman’s job to make sure she doesn’t get pregnant?
4)If someone you have sex with does get pregnant and decides to keep the baby, what responsibility do you have to this child and to the mother?
5)What do you think a father’s responsibilities are?
6) What qualities should a woman look for in a man they want to have children with?
7) Why do you feel we have such an epidemic of “absent“fathers in our culture?
8) What makes a great father?
9) What sacrifices are men generally unwilling to make to be a great father?
10) What will you never give up to be a great husband and father?
As you ponder these questions – and these are only a few of the ones I've been asking the men in MY life! - here's a little feedback from men I've worked with who are asking the big questions about how they relate to the opposite sex.
The guys' in my first men's relationship class talk about how to be honest about what you want out of a relationship!