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Did I tell you that my husband is mean to me?
One Thursday morning, I was getting a cup of coffee when for some reason that darned "HOT NOW" doughnut sign at Krispy Kreme flashed into my mind in all of its red neon glory.
I quickly went into the den and related this to my husband.
"Don't you think it's a revelation or something?" I asked.
"No." he said.
"Well, doesn't a chocolate glazed doughnut sound perfect for breakfast?" I was trying the old get to his heart through his stomach routine.
"No." he said.
"Do you think it might be an omen or something? Something bad could happen if you don't go to KK and buy doughnuts." (Yeah, like I could whine all day...)
"I doubt it's an omen." he said.
Well, I decided not to whine. And I'm pretty sure that I JUST mentioned KK doughnuts 2-3 more times when I was telling my dad and sister's that my mean hubby wouldn't buy me doughnuts...so I didn't nag either.
Flash forward to Saturday:
We had to drive by Krispy Kreme on the way home from grocery shopping at BJ's. I very quietly noted that the "HOT NOW" sign wasn't on, but that I'd be willing to sit in the parking lot until it came on. And it really didn't matter if we had frozen chicken in the back seat because that was for the kids anyway.
He said, "No. They cost too much. They're $6.39 a dozen."
"Well, when we started coming here 25 years ago, they cost about $3.00 a dozen. That is not a huge price increase for 25 years!" I rationalized.
Now, if my math skills didn't totally suck I could have told him right then that that $6.39 price is an increase of less than 14 cents a year! But, it wasn't until I got home and pulled up the calculator, that I figured this out.
Did I get my doughnuts? No. Because he IS mean to me! Don't you think that doughnut deprivation amounts to abuse or neglect or something? Anyway, I'm thinking I'm gonna report his hiney to whomever you report stuff like this to...
Sunday morning:
I woke up to my husband saying, "The doughnuts are on the kitchen table."
As I put a few doughnuts on a plate and poured my coffee, I said, "I guess I'm suppose to write a blog today about what a sweetheart you really are to bring me doughnuts, right?"
He just smiled. So I smiled back and said, "Honey, you KNOW me...I do appreciate the fact that you got up early and went and got me doughnuts! But, more than likely I'll blog complaining that not only did it take 4 days of subtle and not so subtle begging to get my darned doughnuts, but that you woke me up at 8:20 in the freaking morning on a day that I had planned to sleep in!" ;)
Poor guy. Can't win...
Now, excuse me while I go tear the Divorce/ Lawyer section out of the phone books. Wouldn't want to make it too easy for him.
