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What do you think of when you hear the word “spinster?” In addition to thinking of an unmarried woman, you probably picture a woman who is unattractive, or dowdy – someone who would have a hard time attracting a member of the opposite sex due to her appearance, or personality, or both. But if you look at the dictionary definition, being a spinster doesn’t have anything to do with looks.
1. A woman who has remained single beyond the conventional age for marrying.
2. A single woman.
3. A person whose occupation is spinning.
But still, there aren't a lot of attractive single woman out there referring to themselves as spinsters – or at least, there didn’t used to be.
When I did a blog search for “spinster,” I came up with a list of women who are using the word not just in posts they’re writing, but as part of their official blog name. And why not? There are other terms used to describe females that women have taken control of and reclaimed as their own – look at the popular usage of the word “bitch.” (Or Jane Fonda’s casual use of the c-word on the Today show, when she was describing the title of her monologue as part of The Vagina Monologues.) I see no reason why “spinster” shouldn’t be added to the mix.
I can’t help it – I love when women proclaim loud and proud that they’re fine with being single. This doesn’t mean they wouldn’t be just as happy with a partner; it’s that they don’t require the presence of someone else to lead a happy, fulfilling life.
Spinster in the City likes her title and is ready to claim the word for popular use.
As it turns out there are many self-proclaimed spinsters out there online. When I googled Spinster Blog I got 366,000 hits. [...]
So why are we so ready to calls ourselves spinsters? I was starting to call myself spinster at 23! Did that become some sort of self-fulfilling prophecy? I don't know. Maybe we want to call ourselves spinster before anyone else has a chance to. Maybe we have resolved to stay single, so spinster just sounds appropo. Whatever the reason the word spinster doesn't have to be a bad word, actually it sounds kind of hip when you strip all past connotations from it. So lets do just that, let go of the past and embrace the future as single swingin' SPINSTERS!
Devin wrote an interesting post called “The Modern Spinster.”
To a woman in her late 30’s or early 40’s, there are few words that provoke a more negative connotation than spinster. […]
Today’s spinsters are stuck in a temporary time warp. They are creating the role models that the boys of today need to accept the professional women of the future. However, by performing this role for society, they face their own form of discrimination. How many times have these women been asked, “why are you still single?” Or the backhanded compliment, “I can’t understand why men aren’t beating down your door.” Perhaps the men who ask these questions should simply look in the mirror. Modern spinsters are beautiful, successful, confident and interesting. They no longer wear dowdy clothing and blue glasses. They wear the latest fashion and tinted contact lenses. They do not live with their parents. They live in $500,000 condos decorated with antiques and fine art. They wouldn’t even know what to register for because they already have everything.
Maiden Metallurgist likes being single. I bet she wouldn’t mind calling herself a spinster.
At the end of a long day, all I want to do is get home, cook up some supper, and sit down on the couch. I don't want to compromise on dinner or share the remote. I don't feel like talking to anyone. I want to read my book or write a little. Maybe I want to knit or drink wine in a bubble bath. I might watch a Keeping Up With the Kardashians marathon and pick my nose for a while. Make a big bowl of popcorn for dinner and lay in bed watching DVD's on my laptop. I'm not ready to give up this strange behavior, and I expect I'd have to were I to marry.
This is one reason that I'm not just happy, but some days I'm down right relieved I'm single. At a party on Saturday night with maybe 12 couples I found myself a little overwhelmed.
