Renee At 27

On February 29th 2011, I will turn 27 years old. Since there is no February 29th 2011, I will have to choose between celebrating my leap day birthday on February 28th or March 1st. Or maybe I will just stay 24 until 2012. 

I generally try to squeeze a two day celebration out of my non birthday years, but then get called out by family and friends. But hey, if you only had a real birthday every four years wouldn't you? 

Anyhow, as my 27 year approaches I am getting a bit fraking freaked out as they say on Battlestar Galactica. 

Renee Cole at 27 years old in my fantasy life has a couple on Tony Awards, an Oscar Nomination, some People's Choice Awards lying around, and probably a Kids Choice Award or Razzie here and there to hang her clothes and lingerie to dry on. 
Renee at 27 is rich, famous, owns a Central Park West Penthouse, an amazing L.A. mansion with a pool and hot tub and maybe some Alpacas. 
She calls Streisand on weekends to say hi, has random hot sex with Robert Downey Jr. and does lines with Lindsay Lohan and Paris Hilton at the hottest night clubs in Dubai. 
Her biggest decision of the week is deciding between the new LV bag or Tiffany diamond necklace to wear out to lunch.
She is studying the character for her next starring film role and signing her next Broadway big contract, while sipping a Martini on the beach (that she owns). 

Wow, my fantasy life kicks ass!
I like living in my fantasy life so much more than my reality- where my biggest decision of the week was whether or not to apply to Starbucks part time for the health insurance. 

After more than eight years of living in NYC pursuing my dreams, I can't say it isn't depressing that none of them have come true yet. 
At eighteen I always made fun of those thirty year old "loser" out of work actors who were still working in restaurants and auditioning. 
Well, in three short years that could be me. 
I could very well be plummeting toward a life of poorness, dying old and angry with no diamonds, botox, money, awards, or facelifts. 

My life thus far in NYC has been anything but easy. 
Sometimes I don't know if it was sheer stupidity which drew me out of my tiny bedroom on Penobscot Street in Maine to Brooklyn NY, or uncontrolled braveness to have faith in my giant dreams.
Since then I have worked hundreds of promotional, freelance, temp, waitress, reception, modeling,hostess,cleaning,retail,bar tending,office,flyering and sales jobs to survive in NYC. I get tired thinking of them all. 
Somehow at the end of the journey, I have ended up working as a professional Lady GaGa Impersonator. 
Whatever pays the bills is my current motto-accept for that foot fetish party which contacted me to work last week. 
That might pay the bills, but I am not desperate enough to have creepy men lick my toes and get a boner from it. Even for $10 a minute. EW.

In the past I had also spent many lonely nights in NYC Emergency Rooms because I didn't have health insurance, and my thyroid condition was so out of control without the medication I required. I visited so many I could probably start a NYC ER Review blog to rate them all. 
For awhile I had started to think the motto "life sucks then you die" wasn't so far off from the truth. And then I turned 21 and discovered booze. 
Just Kidding.

I guess my point in writing this blog is that life never quite turns out how you imagined it would be. 
But, when I think of the positive things that I have accomplished -though not worldwide fame and awards (YET!) I am proud. And knowing my family background, I am also proud that I can speak in full sentences.

Instead of focusing on fantasy Renee at 27, I will focus on reality. 
The little girl who came from nothing in her Penobscot Street bedroom, has gone onto model for Victor And Rolf, XBOX,Wella,Goldwell and Saks Fifth Avenue. She has acted in several commercials,TV Shows, Off-Off Broadway plays and Indie films. 
Renee at 27 has been on the cover of The New York Times,featured on CNN, Inside Edition, E News, and Entertainment Weekly. 
Renee at 27 has started her own theatre company, is writing plays and directing. 
She still lives in NYC and is writing a book,becoming a yoga teacher, and starting a bakery. 
She also travels New England performing as the best Lady GaGa impersonator in the USA. 

Well,though in addition to all of that I still need a day job, I guess the outlook isn't all that depressing. 
The things that I am doing and pursuing now-though not my first choices, do and will provide the ability and support for me to continue to pursue my dreams. 
I truly believe that you have to dream it to be it.

So fantasy Renee at 27, I am coming for you.

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