Responsibities and Parents

Last week B and I went to one of the Borders that is closing in town and I gravitated to the audio books.  I love listening while I tool around town in my car.  I found this one called Winter Garden by Kristin Hannah.  Not sure why I was drawn to it except the cover art.  I am finding a correlation to my real life as I listen to the thing.  It is about two sisters who have a horrible relationship with their Russian born mother.  The mother, so far, is a very, very cold person and makes it difficult for the girls to relate to her.  Their father, who both girls have a wonderful relationship with is the buffer and glue between them all.  When he dies they are forced to deal with their relationships with the mother.  So far that is just about as far as I have gotten in the book, halfway, but the part I find that identifies with my life is the girls dealing with an aged parent.  The mother is showing signs of dementia, or so they think and is not able to take care of herself, again, or so they think.  This part of the book comes as my siblings and I are facing the health and living problems with my father. 

Tuesday Daddy had yet another minor surgery and they have found that the "infection" has gone clear to the new hip area.  The infection is probably the result of his pneumonia last year.  This probably means more surgery, no driving for a very long time, and his increased dependance on us three.  Daddy actually made the comment about having the feeling of helplessness and dependence.  It has got to be so very scary.  I can't even imagine going from being a big tough guy to totally reliant on others.  He needs us to take him to the doctor, get his meds, his food, his everything.  Plus he lives alone and is incredibly lonely.  I feel so bad for him.  He actually made a statement about thinking about one of those retirement communities.  It made me really contemplate that as an option but I'm not sure if he could afford it.  It would be nice to have him around people.  I think it would help a lot but probably not just yet.  It will probably be an inevitable thing. 

It was weird yesterday but as my brother and I were getting him dressed to go home I too his bicep to help him lift up and pull his pants on and was amazed how strong his arms still are.  Wow, lots of strong muscle.  I think it helps that he is really in very good condition and eats very well.  He's still my very strong Daddy that I used to love to watch. 

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