Rihanna.. Can we talk?
By Cathy Steinberg on January 30, 2013
I understand you want to live your life the way you want to and you feel it’s nobody’s business to judge you. I get it. I really do. Isn’t it what we all want? We all deserve privacy and room to make mistakes. It’s a part of life. Most of us make our mistakes in private or in front of our family and friends. Sometimes repeating mistakes happens too. We all don’t learn our lessons the first time around. This would be all well and good if your name was still Robyn F., but doll, you are Rihanna – loved and admired by millions. Young girls want to be like you. Guys want to be with you. There is no shortage of love for you in the world.
The problem here is the person who should love you the most, doesn’t. I’ll get back to who that is in a moment.
When you decided to take on the persona of Rihanna, singer and entertainer, you also took on an extra set of responsibilities. Although you might say you don’t want those responsibilities, you didn’t ask for those responsibilities…you did. You absolutely did when you set up your public accounts on Facebook, Twitter, instagram and all other social media sites you belong to. You asked young girls to follow you. Those girls are the ones who helped you rise to the top of your game - they are the girls who listen to your music, buy your records, wear your merchandise, and go to your concerts. Those girls are the ones you owe your millions to. They pushed you up because they love and believe in you and because you asked them to.
Weird isn’t it? The notion of having a nice voice and singing some catchy tunes can make people love you, but it does. What you do matters. These girls now emulate you – what you wear, your make up, your hair, AND the way you value yourself.
All the money and fame in the world can’t make you love yourself and treat yourself right. You are the most important person in your life and you have failed yourself. (as well as failing all these impressionable young girls) I’m not talking about failing to obtain the unimportant things such as houses, cars, clothing, and jewels….It’s the real meaningful things like failing to honor your inner goddess and allowing yourself to return to a man who beat you, slapped you, bit you, punched you, choked you into unconsciousness, and embarrassed you.
As women we have struggled and continue to struggle to reach a status of equality, respect, and purpose. We don’t tolerate being beaten by a man. We shun those who would hurt us. Your actions are telling these young girls that it is OK to be beaten, it is OK to allow yourself to be treated like an animal. Even animals don’t deserve the beat down you received.
There are many men in this world who would treat you right. Treat you like you deserve to be treated. You don’t deserve this. Women don’t deserve this. Girls don’t deserve to see this and think it is OK because their idol feels she deserves it.
Let’s review the damage.
See the official police report.
“Brown was driving a vehicle with Robyn F. as the front passenger on an unknown street in Los Angeles. Robyn F. picked up Brown’s cellular phone and observed a three-page text message from a woman who Brown had a previous sexual relationship with.
A verbal argument ensued and Brown pulled the vehicle over on an unknown street, reached over Robyn F. with his right hand, opened the car door and attempted to force her out. Brown was unable to force Robyn F. out of the vehicle because she was wearing a seat belt. When he could not force her to exit, he took his right hand and shoved her head against he passenger window of the vehicle, causing an approximate one-inch raised circular contusion.
Robyn F. turned to face Brown and he punched her in the left eye with his right hand. He then drove away in the vehicle and continued to punch her in the face with his right hand while steering the vehicle with his left hand. The assault caused Robyn F.’s mouth to fill with blood and blood to splatter all over her clothing and the interior of the vehicle.
Brown looked at Robyn F. and stated, ‘I’m going to beat the sh– out of you when we get home! You wait and see!’
The detective said “Robyn F.” then used her cell phone to call her personal assistant Jennifer Rosales, who did not answer.
Robyn F. pretended to talk to her and stated, ‘I’m on my way home. Make sure the police are there when I get there.’ After Robyn F. faked the call, Brown looked at her and stated, ‘You just did the stupidest thing ever! Now I’m really going to kill you!’
Brown resumed punching Robyn F. and she interlocked her fingers behind her head and brought her elbows forward to protect her face. She then bent over at the waist, placing her elbows and face near her lap in [an] attempt to protect her face and head from the barrage of punches being levied upon her by Brown.
Brown continued to punch Robyn F. on her left arm and hand, causing her to suffer a contusion on her left triceps (sic) that was approximately two inches in diameter and numerous contusions on her left hand.
Robyn F. then attempted to send a text message to her other personal assistant, Melissa Ford. Brown snatched the cellular telephone out of her hand and threw it out of the window onto an unknown street.
Brown continued driving and Robyn F. observed his cellular telephone sitting in his lap. She picked up the cellular telephone with her left hand and before she could make a call he placed her in a head lock with his right hand and continued to drive the vehicle with his left hand.
Brown pulled Robyn F. close to him and bit her on her left ear. She was able to feel the vehicle swerving from right to left as Brown sped away. He stopped the vehicle in front of 333 North June Street and Robyn F. turned off the car, removed the key from the ignition and sat on it.
Brown did not know what she did with the key and began punching her in the face and arms. He then placed her in a head lock positioning the front of her throat between his bicep and forearm. Brown began applying pressure to Robyn F.’s left and right carotid arteries, causing her to be unable to breathe and she began to lose consciousness.
She reached up with her left hand and began attempting to gouge his eyes in an attempt to free herself. Brown bit her left ring and middle fingers and then released her. While Brown continued to punch her, she turned around and placed her back against the passenger door. She brought her knees to her chest, placed her feet against Brown’s body and began pushing him away. Brown continued to punch her on the legs and feet, causing several contusions.
Robyn F. began screaming for help and Brown exited the vehicle and walked away. A resident in the neighborhood heard Robyn F.’s plea for help and called 911, causing a police response. An investigation was conducted and Robyn F. was issued a Domestic Violence Emergency Protective Order.”
My words may not mean much to you but understand there are women right now being beaten and abused by men. They feel trapped because they have kids, no money, no help, and feel they can’t get out. These women would do anything to have your money and means to get away.
I wonder how much different your life would be if you were just Robyn and had to endure what you endured that night on a daily or weekly basis? What would your perspective be if you didn’t have the money to get away?
This isn’t how it should be. I just hope young girls who want to be like you, love themselves enough to get away from an abuser - Even if their idol doesn’t love herself enough to stay away.
Violence against women is not OK! And will never be OK no matter who tolerates the beating. Rise up and say NO to abuse!
Know what to do when it matters most!
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