Rock star lover

I am in love with a rock star. Deeply in love. I hear his voice in my head all the time. I dream about him frequently. His words are a source of inspiration to me. When I see him, I have a visceral reaction to the sight of him. When he sings, I am sure he is singing to me. I feel beautiful when I am in the same room (arena?) with him. I feel powerful and sexy and full of "it".

You know...."it".

He is loved by many. Revered by many more. I do not like sharing him. I have his picture on my desk so I can always see him. If he is ever being interviewed I read it and/or watch it. He is brilliant. And deep. Super, super deep.

My feelings about my rock star are almost religious in nature. In fact, witnessing him perform live is akin to going to church. I want to raise my hands and weep. I do both.

If I could just touch him. You know? Shake his hand, and then pull him in for an embrace. I think it would change our (MY) lives. I am sure it would change mine.

Here's the thing....I am not "that" person. I don't have idols. I am not a rabid fan of anything. But there is something about my rock star....from the first time I heard him,

1979, Kathy Ecos' living room, Tiffin, Ohio; I was hooked.

My music library holds 296 files with music and videos of my rock star love. My iTunes has 45 songs of his that are entitled: "my background music". I have to hear him every day. At least once.

The very first time I saw him, he played with Tracy Chapman and Peter Gabriel, at the Oakland Coliseum. It was HIS birthday and we had a sign wishing him a "happy birthday". He totally made eye contact with us (ME). Maybe it was the sign......maybe it wasn't?

I have since seen him 7 other times. The last time I saw him, was the closest I have ever been to him. I was overwhelmed by my own feelings for him. He affects me so deeply. It is incomparable. I have no reference for these feelings. And. That. Is. OK. It just punctuates how special he is.

I am in the midst of a 30 day challenge. But it is not challenging at all. I am posting lyrics to my favorite songs by my rock star love. Different song every day, for 30 days. The only challenge is deciding which, of his 100's of songs, to choose. He is more than a songwriter. He is a poet. He is a preacher. He is a political activist with a social conscious that is quite astute. And yet, he is a blue collar rocker with a heart of gold. And the body of a god. Even at 63 years old, he is a physical specimen. 

I am a rock star lover. My rock star is Bruce Springsteen. He is The Boss. I love him.

My husband knows all about my love for Bruce. He can handle it. I think that if Patti Scialfa met me, she would NOT be able to handle it. It's just a guess though......

I am not going to give him up though. I never will. As long as he continues to make music, I will go and watch him perform. I will buy his CD's and download his songs. I will inundate my children with Springsteen music and help them love him too. He is mine but he belongs to everyone.

                                                    you can't read it in a book

                                                   you can't even dream it

                                                  honey, it aint got a name

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