- Share This Post
- submit
- 9
-
Sparkle (0)
If you're a Parks and Recreation fan, there are three things you know about Nick Offerman's Ron FREAKING Swanson. One, he's a government worker who hates the government. Two, he has a rich and glorious moustache that should get its own billing. Three, he is something of a foodie.
Carefully folded into Parks and Recreation's two seasons are weird and hysterical hints of Ron Swanson's sybaritic predilections. Like, hanging in a place of honor on his office wall is an enlarged stock photo of a plate of eggs. (Breakfast foods are one of his great loves.) And? During a Halloween party, he can be seen tweezing almonds out of the mini Almond Joys because almonds "give [him] the squirts."
Although I am freakishly way too aware of food and drink appearances on television shows (do you want to know about my obsession with the square tomatoes on Monk, and Psych's Fries Quatro Queso dos Fritos, or how many times Yuengling beer has appeared in Bones and The Office?), I didn't start paying rapt attention to Ron Swanson's gastronomic leanings until he made a bizarre deviled egg request in "Leslie's House." After that, I simply had to go back and catalog the best Ron Swanson food moments. (Oh, and develop a deviled egg recipe dedicated to and inspired by Ron FREAKING Swanson's love for breakfast foods and deviled eggs. YOU'RE WELCOME.)
Top 5 Ron Swanson Food Quotes:
1. "If I wanted to bring a large number of deviled eggs, but I didn't want to share them with anyone else, can you guarantee the fridge space?" ("Leslie's House")
2. "That's my number one favorite food wrapped around my number three favorite food. I'd go to a banquet in honor of those Somali pirates if they served bacon-wrapped shrimp." ("The Banquet")
3. "I'm a simple man, I like pretty dark-haired women and breakfast foods." ("Ron and Tammy")
4. "I call this turf 'n' turf. It's a 16-ounce T-bone and a 24-ounce porterhouse. Also, whisky and a cigar. I am going to consume all of this at once because I am a free American." ("Sweetums")
5. "Strippers do nothing for me. I like a strong, salt-of-the-earth, self-possessed woman at the top of her field -- your Steffi Graffs, your Sheryl Swoopeses. But I will take a free breakfast buffet any time, any place." ("Tom's Divorce")
Ron Swanson's No-Share Deviled Eggs
Makes: 12 eggs
Ingredients:
6 hard-cooked eggs, peeled and sliced in half
1/4 cup mayonnaise
2 dashes chipotle Tabasco sauce (smoky and slightly sweet, just like Duke Silver)
2 slices of Ron's #1 food (bacon)
2 large scallions, minced
1 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper
Cayenne (to match Ron Swanson's 'stache and coif)
1. Using a small spoon, carefully remove all the cooked yolks and dump them in a bowl. Add the mayonnaise and chipotle Tabasco sauce and mash with a fork until smooth and combined.
2. Dice the bacon and cook over medium-high heat until crisp. Remove bacon pieces with a slotted spoon and place on a paper towel-lined plate to dry.
3. Add the scallions, salt, and pepper to the yolk mixture and stir to combine. Carefully fold the bacon pieces into the yolk mixture.
4. Fill the egg hollows with the filling and top each egg with a whisper of cayenne.
OPTIONAL: perch Ron's #3 food (shrimp) on top of the filling for a truly decadent result. Tiny prawns or bay shrimp work best.
More Ron Swanson Love
What's Alan Watching: "...Nick Offerman and the "Parks and Rec" writers have combined to turn Ron F'ing Swanson into a man who can say completely demented things with absolute certainty, as if they were the most natural thing in the world."
Wings for Wheels: "[Ron Swanson's] turned into one of those characters who can take a funny scene and nail the line to knock it out of the park with his unique take."
Spunky Bean: "If you don't love Ron Swanson, you don't understand comedy, my friend."
Urbanian: 2009 Funniest TV Character: Ron Swanson
