Ruminations of a 'shut-in'

Manish Arora Candy Hat.

The last thing a shut-in should pay attention to is one's complexion. Since my teen years, I have always thought of myself as a high-priestess of skincare. I love new skin care products, facials, peels, microdermabrasion and on and on. A little effort goes a long way. There is no reason your skin should look like America's decrepit infrastructure. So let me clue you in about one of many products I use to exfoliate and rejuvenate my skin.

Makeup Artists Choice mandelic peel 25%

I use a Mandelic 25% acid peel once a week. This is a light peel which is great for acne, visible pores and wrinkle prevention. The word "acid" is a misnomer. Don't think of this as the acid that gets thrown on Pakistani women when they decline a marriage proposal from their 70 year old cousin. This acid leaves my skin dewy, tight and poreless. More beauty tips to follow in my next blog post. (Get 25% off their products with this coupon code.)

Every day I try to remind myself that when life gives you lemons, make lemonade with at least 4 oz. of good Polish vodka. Otherwise, you might end up eating a handful of Percocet like Tic-Tacs. On the bright side, I have friends, family, a 46 inch LED TV with Blu-Ray and a long list of movies, which keep me entertained. My mind often wanders and I wonder what would be if I broke my femur in 1858 and lived outside of NYC. I wouldn't have Tramadol for starters. I would probably be addicted to morphine and have to whore myself out to get the next fix. All the while sitting uncomfortably in an ugly wooden wheelchair, feathered bonnet, wearing a corset while slowly asphyxiating myself. Then I would roll home, churn butter, press my mother's lace blouse, turn the oven on and shut all the windows. Talk about a mundane infernal existence. God, they didn't even have online courses back then!

TWO and a HALF more weeks, people! Summer, at least, will still be here. Enjoy life and be grateful of having first world dilemmas such as grass fed organic butter or ersatz margarine?!  

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