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Scheduling is a big thing when you first have your baby. It's mentioned everywhere: every book and magazine, every pediatrician and nurse. Parenting website message boards and playgroups and just about everything else discusses how to plan your day with baby, and which way is best. I say that you should just wing it. That's what I did.
There are three basic types of scheduling for the parent/child relationship:
Parent-led Schedules - Parent-led scheduling puts you in control. In this case, you'll do things when you want them done, controlling the times that your children eat, sleep, play, etc. Usually in this case it's difficult to deviate from it after your child gets used to it, or it will upset them. The steady routine can be excellent for some families, and is more practical for working parents or those with other children.
(Most working moms I know abide by this type of scheduling. They can't really look for their children's cues - they have their own routines to follow and everyone has to fall in line, out of necessity.)
Child-led Schedules - Child-led schedules are more free than parent led. In this case, kiddos are pretty much the ones in charge, and you follow their cues to decide what how to proceed with you day, instead of having set in stone times for everything. Now that doesn't mean that every day is crazy and sporadic - usually a month or so after a child is born they develop their own personal routine.
(Many stay at home mothers, especially those that practice Attachment Parenting do this. Everything's focused on the baby and it makes for a more relaxed and smooth running household.)
Combination Schedules - Combination schedules are a mixture between parent-led and child-led routines. You set the routine and follow it every day, but take into account the signals that your child is giving off. This allows both you and your child to be more flexible and cooperative when change happens. If naptime is at noon but you're still grocery shopping, you can postpone it without a complete breakdown of the rest of the day.
I'm a Combination Scheduler. I've always followed the cues of each of my girls, while maintaining a basic overall sense of routine. I figured no one knows better what they want to do when they want to do it than they do, so I'd just go with their flow. It's worked out well for us, especially since both of them are extremely flexible children. A late nap or meal causes no rifts in our day like it can for some families.
When they were babies, I was almost completely child-led. I watched for their signals every day, feeding them when they began showing signs of hunger, lying them down for naps at the first hint of sleepy eyes. Being a stay at home mom made it pretty easy for me to do that. As children normally do, they created their own routines and I was still able to plan outings and events because they did everything generally around the same time.
They're pretty easy children: missing naps or snacks on hectic days never bothers them. Waking up too early or going to sleep later than normal doesn't ruin anything, and I'm lucky I know. I have friends who have to work everything around nap and meal times, or else the day can be shot to hell because the child is miserable because of it. I couldn't imagine that. I don't know if I'm just lucky that my girls are easy going, or if it's the fact that I've always been one to plan my day as it comes, but there's never been a time that a break in routine has caused a serious meltdown.
As my girls grow and approach school age, I try to introduce more structure into their days. Pretty soon they'll be doing everything when they're told to, and every activity will be broken up into schedules and a lot of the freedom they have now will be no more.
So currently, even though I wish they'd stop waking up at 7am sharp and hang around to say, 8 or even 9am, our day is pretty much set. Breakfast is at 8:30, snack is at 10:30, lunch is at 1, afternoon snack is at 3 and dinner is at 5:30. Bathtime is every other day at 7 and bedtime is 7:30-8pm. In between there are tv times, outside times, playtimes and quiet times. They adjusted almost immediately and














