A lesbian couple in the south Indian city of Chennai reportedly burned themselves to death, unable to bear years of forced heterosexual marriages and a lifetime of scorn.

Jaya Verma and Tanuja Chauhan, hailing from a small central Indian town, were luckier -- they didn't die. But the couple, who tied the knot in a Hindu ceremony in 2001, face similar social ostracization.

Their marriage isn't legal. Neither is their relationship. A colonial-era law criminalizes "unnatural" sexual relations. Section 377 of the Indian Penal Code (introduced in 1860 by the British and retained by many South Asian countries after independence) goes something like this:

Unnatural sexual offences: - Whoever voluntarily has carnal intercourse against the order of nature with any man, woman or animal, shall be punished with imprisonment for life or with imprisonment of either description for a term which may extend to ten years, and shall also be liable to fine. Explanation - Penetration is sufficient to constitute the carnal intercourse necessary to the offence described in this section.

[The above information is quoted from a study titled 'Male-to-male sex, and sexuality minorities in South Asia', and is available at Naz Foundation International’s website. The foundation is a UK-based non-profit advocacy group for MSM (gay) networks and HIV prevention in South Asia.]

Naz Foundation (India) Trust (not the Naz International mentioned above), a Delhi-based non-profit working on HIV/AIDS prevention and sexual health in India, challenged the Indian government in the Delhi High Court in 2001, saying the law poses a hurdle in disseminating sexual health information in the gay community, which has a higher incidence of HIV cases than the rest of the population. The High Court initially threw out the petition, but was forced to take a look following a Supreme Court directive.
Human rights advocacy group Lawyers Collective has regular updates of the proceedings

Sexual diversity and the Indian society: Given India's history of being ruled and influenced by multitude of cultures and religious schools of thought, this is highly diffused area. There have been various and divergent claims of religious and social acceptance or the lack thereof of sexual minorities. It is believed that ancient Hindu society was open to and tolerated sexual minorities. Growing up, I have seen eunuchs or hijras (they may be biologically male or intersex), and there is a certain auspiciousness attached to them. Kings have been known to patronize them.

I have seen groups of hijras turn up at homes that have just welcomed a new-born (we often wondered how they found out), demanding money and, on occasions, dancing in their unique style. For the most part, they identify and dress as females in India. Sometimes I have seen families humor them and watch them perform before paying them. Most times people are either terrified or annoyed by their heavy-handedness in extracting a fee.

I understand why. Sexual minorities have a slim to no chance of earning a decent living and leading a normal life while expressing their sexualities.

In her Ultra Violet post on transgenders in India, Anindita Sengupta says:

In India, we live with a level of gender denial that defies all sense
of common decency and humanism — and don’t even notice it most of the
time. Our society consistently rejects and violates an entire group of
people on the basis of their gender. The horror of this never seems to
strike people as they roll up car windows or carefully look away with a
grimace when approached by a hijra. Discussions about this seldom find
their way into the drawing rooms of ‘liberals’.

More recently, however, transgenders and homosexuals are coming out and making their presence felt in mainstream society. Both films and the media have begun discussing issues related to sexual minority.

Naturally, the pressure to decriminalize consensual sex/companionship between two adults, no matter what their sexual orientation, is on the rise.

[Note: There are, of course, two different issues here -- homosexuals who are looking for a change in law, and other sexual minorities such as transsexuals or transgenders who are fighting for social recognition of their chosen sexuality/gender or behavior. I understand that these terms in themselves are complicated and contested, but for the purpose of this post, I shall refer to all unconventional non-heterosexual behavior/realities as sexual minorities.]

What are we afraid of? Let's keep the morality code aside. There seems to be a fear among many that giving legitimacy to sexual minority behavior will "encourage" non-heterosexual behavior in young men and women, and the family system will break down. People who believe that sexual orientation is nature's decision not man's will scoff at such a suggestion. Seems logical.

So what does this fear stem from? Is there a what-if-I-like-it aspect to this (remember George Constanza and his male masseuse in Seinfeld)? While listing the "advantages of being gay", Arnold (Amy and the fifth beatle) argues that all human beings are, basically, "bi-sexual":

I was pondering on and wondering about homosexuality the other day, and
I realized that there are quite a few advantages to being gay. Firstly,
allow me to state that I believe most people are “bi-sexual”. By this I
mean, if 0 is completely straight and 1 is completely homosexual, then
most people would lie somewhere in between. A large majority of people
are close to 0, but they’re not exactly 0. Most things in this fuzzy
world are gray (as opposed to black or white) and so I would assume
that it should be no different for one’s sexual orientation. I would
define true “bi-sexuality” as somewhere between 0.4 and 0.6, but that’s
open to interpretation.

My guess is that a lot of Indians (males particularly) fear this may be true but don't want to figure out if it really is so. Others may have a fear of random sexual experimentation, which, I daresay, may be a valid fear: given the social curbs on free interaction between the opposite sexes, men and women spend a lot of time with their own kind.

However, with norms for social behavior relaxing with time, this is likely to become less of a concern.

Laws aside, the gay community exits in India. For instance, gay bars function but are not advertised.

The power of the Blog: The Internet has provided a platform for many sexually repressed minorities to vent and wage their battles for social change. Blogs by Indian and south Asian sexual minorities, however, are still limited.

Sanjukta (This Is my Truth) has compiled a couple of blogs by gays in her post, which I will include in the list below. Here's her take on the issue:

The social ostracism queers have to face is even worse than police torture.
There prevails a blanket homo-phobia in the society, more particularly
amongst patriarchal hetero sexual man whose man hood is his honour
(which basically is in his D*&$). This ‘man’ refuses to recognize a
gay as ‘man’. A gay is called by names, looked down upon, made fun of,
looked at with suspicion. For an heterosexual man the idea that a man
can be physically attracted to another man is scary and disgusting. I
often hear they say, “what if he feels me up”
[...]
The other day I was talking to a friend whose socio political understanding, outlook
and inclination earns a huge amount of respect from me but it made me
sad to know he is a homophobic. And I just cannot come to terms with
that. This homophobia leads to social ostracism. Like he said, he
wouldn’t not be friends with a gay, says he won’t even like to be seen
hanging around with a gay.

Ergo's fabulous post at Desicritics about being gay in India

Lesley E blogs as Bombay Boy

Nitin Karani's Queer India

Talking Closets

Yugyag (content warning!)

Malika's Indian Transgender Blog

Kalki: The Life and Times of an Indian Transwoman

A spot of good news: Here are some members (mostly Indian) of various sexual minority groups who have made it big --

Indian actress Bobby Darling (Pankaj Sharma).

Popular Pakistani talk show host Begum Nawazish Ali (Ali Saleem) (I am still wondering about this guy, though...Check out this video.)

Indian talk show host, Rose

Indian fashion designer Wendell Rodricks

Other News/Resources:

Seeking Freedom (India Today)

India's dangerous secret sex lives (BBC)

Queer Media Watch

[Photo credit: Afterellen.com. Image from the film Sancharram (The Journey)]