Single Moms Valentines is a Stupid Cupid Holiday Anyway!

      At the start of my single mommyhood, February 14th  was that dreaded day when I felt like an absolute less than. I was the loser, with my pint-sized mini-me's, in tow, walking the world with the proverbial forefinger and thumb “L” tattooed on my forehead. The truth is even when I was a happily married mom, (well maybe not so happily at the end), but married nonetheless, Valentines Day was one of my least favorite holidays. It always seemed so forced and contrived.  

  Eventually as each year passed and I remained a solo Valentines Day celebrator, I began to embrace the holiday in a completely new and healthy context. I made it the special 24-hour period to celebrate loving my self, my best girlfriends and the two most important young ladies in my life, my daughters. Now as a twelve year single mom veteran and author of “It Takes All 5,” I have discovered innumerable ways to make Valentines an Awesome Single Mom celebration. Here are a few of my fav’s I’d like to share with all of you.

1. Watch your favorite sappy chickvids. Open up your best bottle of red (maybe the one you took from your ex’s wine collection when he wasn’t looking), pair it with some rich dark chocolate. Turn down the lights, plug in the DVD and cry your heart out. Not only is it healing, its healthy. Crying releases dopamine, your happy hormone. Or if you’re not the crying type, you can yell at the TV out loud.  No one is there to shush you and a healthy yell releases endorphins, a natural upper.  

2. Make a heart shaped dinner for the little loves in your life. Create an entire heart shaped dinner for you and your children.  Make a meat loaf shaped like a heart using a metal heart shaped cake form. Cut radishes into rose bud shapes and stick them on skewers, put them in a vase as a crudités centerpiece. Crispy kale chips can be scattered on the tables like leaves – super healthy and kids love them because they taste like potato chips.  Single serving heart shaped chocolate cupcakes with tons of luscious pink frosting, that your kids can help you bake, is the piece de resistance! 

3. Have a Bestie VB-Day party. Get together with your best girlfriends pull out the scissors, paste, poster board, old magazines, ribbons, crayons and an awesome bottle of champagne (or two). Turn on the 80’s tunes and have a “new romance” vision board party. Create the Valentines 2014 man of your dreams down to every last detail.

4. Buy a dozen roses for you and your kids.  You don't need a boyfriend to give you a beautiful bouquet of flowers. Do it for you and your children. They make your house smell delicious and just looking at how  beautiful they are will warm your soul.

5. Write yourself a love letter. List all your best ‘being an awesome girlfriend qualities’ you want to bring forward into your next relationship and the not so pretty girlfriend qualities you learned don’t work and will definitely round file forever. If you’re super ambitious... Take it to the next level and write a letter to your new future lover.  Tell him about all the reasons he is going to love cherish and adore you as his girl (because you learned from your past not so good choices — you don’t have to tell him that part. And share all the wonderful qualities about him you love! (Those will be all the good ones from the last relationship you loved plus a few more you know he’s going to have.)

      These are my tried and true’s. I would love to hear how you other single moms have made the most out of your amazing Valentines Day. And however you decide to celebrate this February 14th, make it a powerfully loving day all about the beautiful single mom you are!

 

 

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