Sleeping Together: Bliss or Bad?
By Liz Rizzo on March 12, 2009
BlogHer Original Post
My back has been wrecked for the last couple weeks, and for a beat there I was afraid it was somehow related to sleeping with my new man. And when I say that, I mean literally sleeping. Was my back punishing me for changing up my sleeping positions to cuddle with my partner? Well, yes. But, no.
I realized yesterday that it's the overnight bag I've been slinging over my shoulder - along with my book bag and my purse. My back is having none of it. I'm usually much more careful and aware of this sort of thing, but I've been so damn happy about packing that bag, that I wasn't thinking.
Because to me, sleeping together is bliss. It's just about all I can do tonight to be writing this post instead of running over to my guy's house and burrowing under his covers. See what I do for you?
I had a lover once that I could sleep with (the other great love of my life, and the one I had just before my current Partner Unit). Of the parade of men I have had in my life, he is the only one that I could fall asleep with naturally, and stay asleep. He lived in another area that was quite a haul away, so when we were together we relished every moment of it.
I could fall asleep next to him with no problem. It’s not that he was boring, or not great to talk to-in fact we used to stay up until the early hours talking, trying to share everything in the short amounts of time we had together. When one of us would begin to drift off the other would pretend to be annoyed, but the truth is, we were just so damn glad to be together that it didn’t matter.
On the other hand, Jessica from Jezebel blogged Survey Says: Sleeping Apart Can Save Your Relationship:
Some of the major problems between co-sleepers include snoring, kicking, and wrestling for the covers — but on a more basic level, each person has a different body clock, and some people are morning people (called "larks" by sleep experts) and some are night people (called owls). All of this is clearly common sense, but the Times called in sleep expert Sammy Margo to give a couple called the Millards some advice on how to deal with an owly husband and a wife who is neither lark nor owl.
Jessica ultimately says, "There's something kind of lonely about the idea of a couple sleeping apart," and I have to agree. I can't imagine having a partner and not going to sleep next to them at night!
And on the way, way other end of the spectrum, Sharon blogs on She Worships about Sleeping Over: The Latest Trend in Christian Sketchiness:
I think most Christians would agree that having sex before marriage is wrong. After all, Scripture is pretty clear on the topic over and over again. What is a little less clear is the lines we cross leading up to sex. I can’t count the number of dating talks I’ve attended in which some ambiguously intentioned young person asked, “How far is too far?” For many of us, we feel like we’re doing pretty well as long as we’re not going “all the way,” so prior to that boundary almost anything goes.
Because of this mentality, a new trend in Christian dating has developed: sleeping together but not having sex. Countless Christian couples will share a bed for the night without doing the actual deed, and I’ve done it myself. And on some level, it would seem pretty innocent–all you’re doing is sleeping together. That’s not so bad, right?
I'll give you a hint; she's not going to be suggesting I simply switch to a wheelie overnight bag.
Finally, two quick links:
And Miss Britt is giving away a very fine mini vibrator. You've got until March 17th to enter. Here's hoping the luck of Irish is on *my* side!
Updated to add one more cool link: As I was closing tabs on my browser I realized that I meant to link to this extremely cool video featuring a sleeping couple: Her Morning Elegance / Oren Lavie. Love it!
Contributing editor Liz Rizzo also blogs at Everyday Goddess.
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