By Mouthy Housewives on February 29, 2012
Dear Mouthy Housewives,
The parents of my son's best friend are going through a divorce. I don't know the dad very well, but I know he cheated on his wife and that's what led to the break up. I don't have a very high opinion of him, to say the least.
Since the boy lives with his father part-time now, I have the dilemma of what to say when my son is invited to sleep over. I have no good reason for saying "no" besides the fact that I have no respect for the dad and hate dealing with him (even though he's usually very polite.) Plus I don't know if he's going to have girlfriends, etc. over there or what his living situation really is.
Should I just get over myself? Am I being prejudiced? Is it okay to ask the boy's mother her opinion? Help!
Sleep Over Dilemma
Dear Sleep Over Dilemma,
Every parent has a different policy about sleep overs. Mine is pretty sophisticated: No sleep overs at my house, unless court-ordered. And by court-ordered I mean that the other parents are starting to mention that they hosted 80 sleep overs in a row and I owe them. If there's one thing I can't stand it's people who keep tabs like that. But nevertheless in such cases of threatened civil unrest I will agree to have their tykes over.
That wasn't the question, dummy.
But bear with me.
Because my personal sleep over philosophy affects my advice.
See, I think that as long a child is having fun with a friend, is safe and is at someone else's home, all is well.
Of course what constitutes safety is up for debate and your own comfort level. To me, it's having a responsible adult at home who will provide adequate supervision. (Although I've been known to let one of my kids sleep over in a home where the parents were NASCAR fans.)
The dad is a huge cheater pants and you don't respect him. But do you have to respect the parents of all of your children's friends? Because taking on the sins of the father is a heavy burden for a child. Especially one that your son really likes.
So if you feel that your son is safe at this dad's house, let him sleep over. It's about the children, after all. And getting some peace and quiet while you're at it.
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Photo Credit: mmmchoco.
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