Thinking About Cheating? Read This
Editor's Note: Cheating is an all too common problem for people in long-term relationships. In this piece on the Post-Divorce Chronicles, Lee Block digs deep into the heart of cheating, driving a single point home: a reason is never a justification. -- AVF
Whether or not you have been doing back flips to ensure the happiness of your partner, there is no excuse to cheat – ever. It doesn't matter if you haven't had sex with your spouse for 10 years or had an intimate moment in five years. There are no excuses.
Photo by Ed Yourdon.
Being adults, we all have choices we can make in life. It is called free will. If you are at a crossroads, you get to choose the path you will go down. Think of what would happen if you talked to your spouse before climbing between the sheets with the hottie at work. Would it fix the relationship? Who knows, but at least you tried. And if you have already tried, instead of humiliating them by going outside your relationship for fulfillment, give them a divorce so they have a fighting chance at feeling better about themselves without having to deal with the outcome of "my spouse cheated."
No matter what the final outcome of an affair exposed is honesty is always the best policy. It will serve you and your partner better to be honest and upfront about the situation. This is where you have the chance to save what is left of a broken relationship. Of course, it is always better to be honest before it happens, but if that doesn't happen, then have the guts to be honest afterwards. The emotional damage to the person who was cheated on is great and it is a self-esteem and trust killer. Try to put yourself in their shoes. Imagine what it feels like to wonder why, what, where and how. Answer every question that is asked and don’t get defensive. After all, you were the one that crossed the line.