Dear June

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Dear June Bugs,(Or phyllophaga, order of coleoptera, as I've heard you like to be called in formal settings...)In case you haven't been informed, it's only March 21st.You're a little early to the party, and that is in direct violation of Emily Post's Party Manners 101. According to my etiquette resources, arriving early is a major faux pas, and you should actually aim to arrive between 5-15 minutes of the time posted on your invitation (which, by the way, I did not send to you). I did some calculations, and this makes your suggested arrival time somewhere around July 4.

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